Entertainment

15 Fictional Summer Camps You Wish You’d Attended

With the premiere of NBC’s Camp and USA’s Summer Camp, it’s easy to feel nostalgia for summer camp — at least the fictional ones. Here are some of the camps that would have made your summer complete.

15. Camp Crystal Lake (Friday the 13th)

Paramount Pictures

OK, so there’s a really good chance you’re going to get horribly murdered by a machete-wielding psychopath. But if you’re a counselor, there’s an equally good chance you’re getting laid!

14. Kamp Krusty (The Simpsons)

FOX

Well, not until after Bart’s coup. Or maybe once Krusty shows up and takes everyone to Tijuana.

13. Camp Hope (Heavyweights)

Buena Vista Pictures

Chances are you don’t want to spend your summer at fat camp, but imagine the fun of a successful rebellion against evil fitness guru Tony Perkis. And then you get to eat whatever you want!

12. Kamp Kikakee (Ernest Goes to Camp)

Buena Vista Pictures

As a nation, we remain divided on Ernest. If you’re a fan, however, you’d get a kick out of being one of the juvenile delinquents he supervises. Bonus: you totally get to save the camp from a corrupt mining corporation.

11. Camp Tamakwa (Indian Summer)

Buena Vista Pictures

Ah, nostalgia. Of course, in this movie, it’s nostalgia for a camp we’ve never been to. But still: being able to have fond memories of camp as an adult is kind of the whole point, right?

UPDATE: This is actually a real camp! Sorry, Camp Tamakwa campers. Um, the characters in the movie are fictional!

10. Camp Victory (Huge)

ABC Family

Yes, another weight loss camp. But this one’s populated with the kind of complex, well drawn young people that you basically only find on canceled-too-soon ABC Family dramas. Those are friends for life!

9. Camp Ivanhoe (Moonrise Kingdom)

Focus Features

OK, the real appeal of Camp Ivanhoe is escaping Camp Ivanhoe. Still, there’s something so inviting about the camp itself. Perhaps the twee outfits and color palette?

8. Tall Oaks Band Camp (American Pie)

Universal Pictures

It’s a great place to explore your musical abilities. And other things.

7. Camp Firewood (Wet Hot American Summer)

USA Films

You don’t have to be Jewish to attend Camp Firewood, but it helps. Also be sure to prepare a miraculous talent for the talent show — preferably one that averts a major disaster.

6. Camp Rock (Camp Rock)

Disney Channel

If it’s good enough for Demi Lovato, it’s good enough for you. Oh, like you’ve never thought about jamming with the JoBros.

5. Camp Walden (The Parent Trap)

Buena Vista Pictures

There’s fencing, your counselor is Janice from Friends, and you reunite with your long-lost twin sister. It’s hard to imagine a more memorable summer camp experience.

4. Camp Ovation (Camp)

IFC Films

Performing arts camp might not appeal to everyone, but if you’ve ever felt like an outcast, you can relate to the colorful freaks and weirdos at Camp Ovation. Plus, everyone is super talented and weirdly bisexual.

3. Camp North Star (Meatballs)

Paramount Pictures

The camp itself is a mess, but when your counselor is Bill Murray, does it really matter? Unless you’d rather attend Camp Mohawk, you snob.

2. Camp Anawanna (Salute Your Shorts)

Nickelodeon

We hold you in our hearts! Fun people, minimal supervision (Ug hardly counts), and delightful pranks like, you know, saluting someone’s shorts. There’s a reason we still look back fondly on the summer of 1991.

1. Camp Nowhere (Camp Nowhere)

Buena Vista Pictures

The best thing about Camp Nowhere: it’s whatever the hell you want it to be. With Doc Brown — OK, “Dennis Van Welker” — in charge, you basically get free reign to create your own perfect summer experience. No camp has ever seemed more exciting.

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