20 Completely Valid Reasons To Eat Fish McBites

McDonald’s newest culinary invention deserves your respect.

1. They’re like fish sticks.

And who doesn’t like fish sticks? I would eat fish sticks for every meal if they weren’t loaded with preservatives and deep fried in oil.

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2. But they’re bitesize!

FACT: Everything is more delicious and adorable when you can eat it in one bite.

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3. They won’t be around forever.

Do you know what “limited time” means? It means RUN, DON’T WALK.

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4. They’re an excuse to get fries.

Like you needed an excuse.

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5. Or even one of these monstrosities.

Live your best life.

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6. They’re kind of cute.

Right? Well, they’re not un-cute.

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7. Actually they look like the Popplers from “Futurama.”

20th Century Fox

And I know those turned out to be baby aliens, but come on, you totally wanted to try a Poppler, consequences be damned.

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8. And sometimes fish are ugly.

Fish are nature’s underwater monsters. THANK GOODNESS a fast food chain will make them cute and ball-shaped before we have to eat them.

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9. The name is silly, but so what?

You know who else has a silly name? Grimace. Everyone loves Grimace.

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10. They are almost definitely horse-free.

Imagine trying to sneak a horse into a bite-size nugget of fish. Very difficult.

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11. They don’t exist in the Weight Watchers database.

No point value means you can eat as many as you want! I’m pretty sure that’s not how Weight Watchers works, but really who knows?

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12. You have unlimited dipping options.

You could go the traditional tartar sauce route, but maybe you’re feeling a little adventurous and want to go crazy with some ketchup or barbecue sauce. It’s your life. It’s your choices.

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13. They might even taste good with Nutella!

Everything tastes good with Nutella.

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14. They’re a good source of protein, presumably.

Because fish have protein! What are you going to do, drink a bunch of Protein McShakes?

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15. McDonald’s reminds you of your childhood.

You love remembering the ’90s, and chances are, you ate at McDonald’s in the ’90s. Remember??

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16. They have a 0 percent mortality rate.

In the brief period of time that Fish McBites have been around, not a single customer has died as a result of eating them. Wow!

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17. Fried food makes you happier.

Unless you’re some sort of mutant. If you’re a mutant, maybe don’t bother with Fish McBites.

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18. No bones!

The worst part about eating fish is getting a bone stuck in your throat. I highly doubt you’ll find any fish bones in your Fish McBites.

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19. They cost literal pennies.

Yes, for a mere 229 pennies, you can get the snack size. What a steal.

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20. They probably taste fine.

I wouldn’t know. I’ve never tried them. I’m just saying you should. And report back when you do, OK? I’m not going into this blind.

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