1. 1. Paris Hilton
I’m glad this sex tape star wants to do something better with her life. Oh I know, lets have her start grinding on a kid’s bed while he fantasizes about you. Ew, gross. No. This is a joke right? Did she really think that was going to work out for her?
2. 2. Jennifer Love Hewitt
Ok, I’ll admit it. Jennifer Love Hewitt is adorable. But shes kinda like the little sister who is trying a bit too hard to make this seem normal. It just feels a little off.
3. 3. Bruce Willis
This is actually awesome is a way only the 80’s can provide.
4. 4. Mr. T
When Mr. T tells you to treat your mother right, you listen! I pity the fool who tells a “yo mama jokes” in front of him.
5. 5. Eddie Murphy
Even teaming up with MJ couldn’t save this career jump. Also, please see “Party all the time”.
6. 6. Kobe Bryant
WHHHHHHHHHY KOBE WWWWWWWWHHHYYYYYY???
7. 7. Gwyneth Paltrow
OK, this is hard for me because Gwyneth is my girl. I love her and she is an amazing actress. But ever since I saw her on Glee and dancing on a piano with Cee Lo, it just felt like it was beneath her. Your husband is a great song writer/singer and you have talent girl, but please just stick to what you are great at, not just what you can pass at.
8. 8. William Shatner
This is what people at my college listened to when they were stoned. Only then is this good.
9. 9. David Hasselhoff
I’m embarrassed for his family.
10. 10. Kim Kardashian
Are we really surprised this happened? It was only a matter of time. And it sounds exactly like I thought it would: unoriginal and overly sexed up as any rich, young Hollywood why-is-she-famous girl with a sex tape would make.
11. 11. Serena Williams
From what I have seen of this girl’s tennis playing, she has the body and attitude to almost pull off a rap career. Almost…..
12. 12. Ron Artest
You and Kobe need to get together and really think about your actions.
13. 13. Jackie Chan
From what I have read, Jackie Chan has had some great luck with his singing overseas. Actually, I find him adorable and I want this to work for him. You go Jackie Chan! You sing your heart out!
14. 14. Scarlett Johansson
Ugh I hate her. I don’t need any more reason than that. Go away girl. And leave The Avengers while you’re at it, too. Thanks.
15. 15. Russell Crowe
Russell Crowe used to be a lounge singer called Russ le Roq and even formed a band, “Roman Antix”, which later evolved into the Australian rock band 30 Odd Foot of Grunts. But there is a reason this didn’t work out. Stick to acting and if you must sing, do more musicals like Les Mis. If you must…..
16. 16. Heidi Montag
Lets just add this to the pile of untalented girls with too much time and money on their hands. I almost feel sorry for her because no one has the heart to tell her that she sucks. But I guess its easier to be sad later when you are crying in your mansion.