1. Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, or Belle?
She’s a girl full of passion.
Seems like an easy person to live with.
Kill?Kill Sleeping Beauty
Would anyone really miss her?
5. Snow White, Ariel, or Pocahontas?
You wouldn’t want to marry her…chances are she’ll leave you once she gets tired of land and falls back in love with her high school mer-friend.
Just so long as you can keep up with her.
Kill?Kill Snow White
Her voice is just too annoying.
9. Prince Charming (Cinderella), Prince Eric (The Little Mermaid), or Prince Phillip (Sleeping Beauty)?
Look, the guy bases his romantic interests on looks alone, so chances are the guy has a wandering eye. If it wandered onto you…why not?
Marry?Marry Prince Charming
Seems like a safe bet.
Kill?Kill Prince Phillip
What do we REALLY know about this guy? Kind of a creeper.
13. The Beast, Simba, or Aladdin?
Not worth killing, and a bit too young and flighty to really settle down.
Kill?Kill The Beast
With this dude’s mood swings, chances are he’d kill you anyhow. Might as well defend yourself.
16. The Genie, Sebastian, or Flounder?
The guy’s a musician with an accent…you know he’s all action.
Marry?Marry The Genie
Obvi. ‘Cause then you can just wish to be married to Ryan Gosling.
20. Alice, Jasmine, or Mulan?
Always marry the warrior.
This chick. Nothing but trouble.
24. Mrs. Potts, The Magic Carpet, or Grandmother Willow?
Fuck?Bang The Magic Carpet
He’d show you a good time.
Marry?Marry Mrs. Potts
‘Cause she’d make a great parent.
Kill?Kill Grandmother Willow
Just to see if she would actually die. There’s a 50 percent chance she kills you back.
28. Peter Pan, Captain Hook, or Gaston?
Aren’t you a bit curious? You could at least get back at him by spreading a rumor about his tiny manhood.
Marry?Marry Peter Pan
Ugh. Yeah. You’d just have to wait until you’re about 13 years into your relationship before he’s able to put a ring on it.
Kill?Kill Captain Hook
He’s a psychopath anyhow.
32. Maurice (Belle’s dad), The King (Prince Charming’s father in Cinderella), or King Triton?
Damn, he looks good. Silver fox mermannnnn.
It’s a risk, for sure. But you have to hold out hope that one day one of his crazy inventions will make you both mega-rich.
Kill?Kill The King
There’s evidence he may be deranged anyhow.
36. Ursula (The Little Mermaid), the Evil Queen (Snow White), or Evil Stepsisters (Cinderella)?
She’s kinda sexy.
Marry?Marry The Evil Queen
I mean. The marriage would probably just be for show anyhow.
Kill?Kill Evil Stepsisters
THE WORST AND THERE’S TWO OF THEM.
Because killing or banging is just…so…wrong. Plus, it’s JTT! Swoon.