1. Planning for the trip to Disneyland as a kid: The best news you have ever received. You can barely contain yourself.
Your entire life has been leading up to this moment.
Planning for the trip as an adult: You search for a “reason” to go, and quietly express your excitement.
Because you’re not 5 anymore, right? Just play this cool.
2. Arriving at Disneyland as a kid: AHHH I’M FREAKING OUT WHAT DO WE EVEN DO FIRST?
Arriving at Disneyland as an adult: Let’s get this party staaaAAAaaarted!
And then you act as if you are a downright expert on the park, even if you haven’t been there for years.
3. Sleeping Beauty’s castle as a kid: Thou art so majestic and beauteous; I am humbled before your greatness and magnitude.
Sleeping Beauty’s castle as an adult: How is it so small??? It is really small.
4. Jungle Cruise as a kid: Wait, are those REAL elephants?
Jungle Cruise as an adult: Hmmm …
This is kind of uncomfortable.
5. Minnie’s house in Toontown as a kid: I can please live here please?
Minnie’s house as an adult: Wow, A LOT of children touch everything in here. Hand sanitizer first, please?
OK, yeah, still kind of want to live in there.
6. Meeting Disney characters as a kid: OMG CELEBRITIES!!!
Meeting characters as an adult: I know you are a real person inside there.
7. Fantasyland rides as a kid: Mr. Toad is totally scary! Ahhhh!
Fantasyland rides as a grown-up: Yeah, sure, I’ll go on this. Not like I’m really going to enjoy it or anything.
J/K totally enjoying this!
8. The Haunted Mansion, as a kid: SCARY RICH PEOPLE ARE SCARY AND I AM NOW FOREVER AFRAID OF ELEVATORS.
Haunted Mansion, as an adult: Huh, I never appreciated this beautiful architecture. Honey? Should we plan a trip to New Orleans soon?
9. Long lines as a kid: Is 80 minutes a long time? I don’t THINK SO?!
Long lines as an adult: How is that even humanly possible?
Is there a manager I can speak to or something? I don’t think you understand that I’ve been here all day and I can’t leave without going on Splash Mountain?
10. Splash Mountain as a kid: Psyche yourself up all day long for this. Everything is leading up to this.
Splash Mountain as an adult: Still super scary and thrilling and fun oh my gosh so much fun!
11. Money as a kid at Disneyland: Mom, can I get this? And this? And this? Andthisandthisandthisandthis?
Money at Disneyland as an adult: DISNEYLAND MUST MAKE A FORTUNE OMG.
If an adult ticket costs $96 .. let’s see … 96 + 96 + 96 +96 +96 + 96 …. boy oh boy. There are like, hundreds of thousands of dollars represented right here!
12. 4 p.m. at Disneyland as a kid: Let’s go! Let’s go let’s go let’s goooooo!
4 p.m., as an adult: Must. Keep. Going.
Newfound appreciation for all the parents in the world, everywhere.
13. Food at Disneyland as a kid: Do we REALLY have to stop to eat? I can just eat like five churros while we wait in line.
Food at Disneyland as an adult: Why not also turn this trip into a culinary adventure?
14. Taking pictures at Disneyland as a kid: How you relive the magic when it’s over, a thing you do because “memories” and stuff.
But, c’mon guys! The line for Pirates is only 20 minutes now!
Taking pictures at Disneyland as an adult: I’m at Disney!! Meanwhile YOU are at work muahahahhaha.
15. Getting soaked on Splash Mountain as a kid: AWESOME!!
Getting soaked on Splash Mountain as an adult: And you thought it could be avoided … nope!
16. How you feel at the end of the day as a kid: I can’t believe it’s over. It can’t be over.
How you feel at the end of a day at Disneyland, as an adult: Disney is a very profound thing.
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