14 Ways "Harriet The Spy" Totally Messed You Up

Prepare to cry a bit. It’ll be cathartic.

1. Having parents who don’t understand you isn’t foreign to the kids’ genre…

But Ole Golly’s description of why they’re not present at home is particularly disheartening and even scarier because it’s accurate.

2. Then Harriet has the rug ripped out from underneath her…

You’re now witness to a defining childhood moment — which you probably didn’t realize as a kid — but as a grown-up, you’re like, whoa, here’s the moment where everything changed.

3. This scene, where the goodbye begins…

Will break your heart.

4. As Harriet continues with Ole Golly’s departure…

You start to realize how devastating this is. As a kid, it probably made you feel scared and you wondered, Is this how hard it’ll be when I have to say goodbye to someone?

5. After Ole Golly leaves, Harriet feels completely alone.

SO. EMPTY. INSIDE.

6. And the man with all the cats on her spy route…

ALSO NOW COMPLETELY ALONE.

7. As is Eartha Kitt, who, despite having amazing pink hair…

COMPLETELY EFFING ALONE. Are you reaching for the Prozac yet? Just wait…

8. After her classmates discover her notebook, things go seriously downhill…

And this scene gets to you because at one point or another, you spent a lunchtime in a bathroom alone dealing with some paranoia.

9. And at every point in a kid’s life…

They’re going to cry behind their bedroom door and tell their parents’ that they’re fine. Like you did. A million times.

10. This is mad harsh.

And if you saw this and your dad lived far away, this’d probably cause you to freak the fuck out.

11. But here’s the thing about Harriet’s obsession with spying…

It may have made her quirky, insightful, and special, but in a way, she wasn’t particularly careful. Dare I say it? She was begging to get caught. She subconsciously wanted her parents to notice her.

12. But of course it hurts when your parents take away the one thing you love…

And WTF because isn’t Harriet’s dad also a writer? In TV? In the beginning of the film, Harriet overhears him stressing about his job and he says, “He asked me to come up with something new, something fresh. You read it. It was good. It was the funniest script we’ve had all year!”

13. Great. Now Harriet has landed herself in the shrink’s office.

14. And her best friend says this?!

So simple. But so hurtful.

But, okay. Everything in “Harriet the Spy” turns out okay and there are moments like this…

Still…tear of beauty.

And Ole Golly’s wisdom is particularly amazing.

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