love the commentary

MYTH BUSTED!!

usain bolt of turtles

That's a Florida Soft Shell. Trust me on this one. :)

Ill tell my bookie to change my bet now… I told y'all rabbit people will eat carrots tonight while I roll in the green.

Though I doubt it's a “slider”, sliders like the Red Belly Slider are name so because they do they use that same exact technique to escape quickly. Apparently other turtles do too.

where the hell is our resident Turtle expert when you need him/her?? Sorry turtle feed I assume you're male, but I haven't taken the time to figure it out..

I think a combination of strong legs and a belly that functions like a surf-board on tall grass when going downhill all combined to make this one fast summa' bitch.

that's a snapping turtle. they hurt. horribly.

Didn't he see the NO2 tanks protruding from under the shell?

That's crazy.

Umm, tortoises are supposed to be slow, never heard that about turtles. So, nothing surprising?

Hacker.

“are you kidding me?”  he sounds like he was ripped off by the turtle