1. You tell yourself you’ll only spend 20 minutes there.
But you actually spend over an hour.
2. You don’t grab a cart because you don’t need much.
And then five minutes later run frantically to get one.
3. After you get your cart, you remind yourself that you only need a couple of things.
And end up filling your cart within 15 minutes.
4. You declare that you can AND will avoid the shoe section, because you have enough shoes.
And then you look through the section and find a pair that you HAVE TO HAVE.
5. You tell yourself you won’t look at the clothes.
But then you’ll definitely look at the clothes. It isn’t YOUR FAULT the clothes are on your way to the food.
6. You tell yourself that the dollar section is full of things you don’t need.
Then waste 15 minutes looking through it.
7. You think to yourself, “Hmm, I just looked at the home decor last week.”
So, of course, you go look to see if anything has changed.
8. You assume there isn’t anything new on sale.
But you check it out JUST IN CASE.
9. You go look for a FEW groceries.
But you’re hungry and therefore you buy literally everything.
10. You try to avoid the freezer section.
But then remember ice cream exists.
11. You pass the alcohol, and stop, because obviously.
You have plenty of wine at home, but can you ever have enough?!?
12. You pass the nail polish aisle and stop to take a look, even though you have plenty at home.
So you grab a couple of Essies to add to the collection!! ~ Welcome to the family. ~
13. Then you see the hair section, and realize you’ve lost, and Target has won.
You don’t need any shampoo, but after smelling a few, you convince yourself to try something new anyway.
14. You realize you’ve spent too much time in Target and really need to leave.
But you have to check out the accessories first!!!
15. You try to stay strong in the checkout line because you’ve already spent enough.
But then, you see FRUIT SNACKS. And remember you need gum, and Chapstick. And…shit.
16. And then tell yourself you’re good on Target for, like, a while.
And then come back the next week.