Here is the Fat Lady we currently have in the Harry Potter movies, she protects the entrance to the Gryffindor common room.
BUT HERE IS THE FAT LADY WE DESERVE. HERE IS THE FAT LADY WE NEED.
"GOD DAMN IT SIRIUS BLACK WAS HERE!"
"If you would just....excuse me for a minute....I'd like to carry out my hysterics in private."
"OH SWEET SIMPLE HARRY, I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE SECOND TRIWIZARD TASK WILL BE, FOR I AM A JUST A PAINTING WITH FANTASTIC TITS."
"Oh Dum Dum Krum, you know you can't enter the common room. It was never gonna work out between you and Hermione anyway."
*stares down at Nearly Headless Nick*
Imagine the possibilities.