Otters Are The Rudest Creatures Ever

    These sassy little river cats float downstream screaming slander about your mom.

    Otters: the sassy broletariat of the animal kingdom.

    They miss every shot and never pass the ball.

    They never hang up in the grocery checkout line.

    You will otterly regret inviting them to your house.

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    They'll bully your dog.

    And walk away with all your beers.

    They never appreciate your homecooking.

    Nor the gifts you buy them.

    Nor the cup-stacking game you invite them to play.

    Tell them about your awful day. See if they care.

    Spot them across the street–

    –and they'll act like they don't know you.

    Get into any argument with them and they're like:

    So unchill of you, ott.

    Can't bring you anywhere.