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Let's talk about FEELS.
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Sometimes you drown in them.
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Sometimes they fall out of your goddamn cupboard.
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Sometimes they come crashing from the goddamn sky.
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Sometimes they barrel down the sidewalk and crash behind your knees.
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Or maybe they swallow you up.
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FEELS give you wings.
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FEELS may have shifted in the overhead compartment during the flight.
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Take a FEELS football in your FEELS thorax.
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Don't ever hold them.
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Don't ever try to keep up.
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Don't ever enter a FEELS arena.
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Be careful when you're buying a FEELS hot dog at a FEELS hot dog stand!
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FEELS: one of America's leading natural disasters. 313 million people suffer from them every year.
