Ranking Disney Princesses By Sex Appeal

They all want to look like Nala in that tall grass.

Some leading Disney women have been added who are not in the "official lineup" because it’s embarrassing that they’ve been forgotten k bye.

And if you're about to argue they aren't real princesses, Mulan isn't either so slow your roll.

16. Snow White

Pros:

* She has nice skin. You know who else has got nice skin? Hermione.

Cons:

* Her voice is super shrill.

* She lives with strangers.

* She has no personality.

* She's scared of almost everything so she's not adventurous.

* She's the actual definition of something whiter than vanilla.

* Oh yeah and she’s 14 you super perv. Being sexy isn’t really legal until adulthood.

15. Merida

Pros:

* She's a super fiery redhead who won’t settle for just anyone going for her heart.

Cons:

* She's 16 and not ready for marriage (like the other 16 year olds who totally are).

* She eats haggis.

* There are a lot of in-law issues you’d have to deal with, I heard the queen is a real bear.

14. Aurora

Pros:

* Her hair even in the woods with incompetent guardians is flawless.

* She is totally impressed by strangers wooing her.

* She’d probably leave the bar with you if you sang a duet with her.

Cons:

* Like Merida, she’s 16 so pipe down.

* Also, this match has been made since her infancy, and heaven forbid the shades of the 15th century are to be thus polluted.

13. Ariel

Pros:

* She rocks a clam bra.

* She's unembarrassed about being naked or wearing a sail.

* She'll put out on the first date.

Cons:

* She’s 16 and no matter what she yells at her dad, she's not an adult so take a walk for a few years people.

12. Jasmine

Pros:

* This awesome red outfit and harem dance.

* Her fiery temper.

* She literally has a tiger in her Tinder profile.

Cons:

* She’s supposed to be 15 going on 16 which is even more than a little naïve according to Liesel Von Trapp.

* All of these princesses are sort of sex offender-y.

11. Cinderella

Pros:

* She is desperate for romance.

* She is easily pleased by material gifts.

* She’s super easy to befriend or talk to (just ask the mice).

* She's over 18.

Cons:

* She’s flaky and apt to disappear at random hours.

* She's also pretty vanilla.

* She's not super adventurous but rather up for the white picket stepford life.

10. Rapunzel

Pros:

* This girl has phenomenal magic hair that can make everything better.

* She's willing to fall for the first person she meets.

* She's ready to see the world.

Cons:

* She's got really weird emotional baggage and complicated family life.

* She also does super embarrassing things in public like lay in the dirt, talk to flowers, and violate bar etiquette.

9. Anna

Pros:

* She likes to try new things.

* She doesn't think foot size matters.

* She's got tons of pent up energy from being a shut in.

Cons:

* She's got a way scary big sister.

* She's not a good judge of character.

* She got engaged to someone she had known for a few hours.

8. Belle

Pros:

* She's super smart and well read so she knows stuff other girls probably don’t.

* She's not afraid of smacking wolves upside the head.

* She can rock clothes that have been locked in a wardrobe for ten or more years.

Cons:

* She's not really into sex appeal and was unimpressed with the hairy Adonis Gaston.

* She would rather read with tea in bed than do anything else in it.

7. Mulan

Pros:

* This girl is as mysterious as the dark side of the moon.

* She has been behind the scenes so she knows what men and women like.

* Her thirst is real.

Cons:

* She probably kept a lot of gross habits like burping and scratching.

6. Tiana

Pros:

* This girl knows what she wants.

* She rocks the flapper look.

* She has an amazing body without trying since she works all the time and eats fried gumbo (her genetics are working it just look at her mama).

Cons:

* She’s not a big romantic and will probably laugh at your come on.

5. Elsa

Pros:

* Look at this dress. She will be awesome at making clothes for any fantasies you have.

* Look at this eyeshadow and smirk and sexy hip walk.

* Her voice can thaw that frozen heart.

Cons:

* She’s really into finding herself right now and not really into a relationship.

4. Pocahontas

Pros:

* She rocks leather.

* She probably never wears underwear.

* Her hair is always fierce.

* She’s wild at heart.

* Look at those lips.

Cons:

* Deodorant hasn’t been invented yet.

3. Kida

Pros:

* This girl can speak pretty much every language ever.

* She looks smoking in a swimsuit.

* She literally wears a bra and wrap.

* She doesn't age.

Cons:

* She lives in a very remote underwater city so the commute would be terrible.

2. Tinkerbell

Pros:

* She wears leaves for clothes.

* She is the definition of hourglass figure.

* She's super passionate.

Cons:

* Super passionate also means super jealous in a condemn-another-girl-to-death-by-letting-her-get-shot-out-of-the-sky way.

1. Megara

Pros:

* Oh man look at that figure.

* Look at her smirks and smoky eye.

* She has that dripping femme fatale voice.

* Also she sells her soul for the man she loves.

* Did you really think this list would end with any other winner?

Cons:

* Made a deal with the devil for some guy.

* But hey you’re going there anyways for considering how sexy beloved children’s characters are. I'll save you a seat.

We all know the real winner here.

Who was kept off the list by virtue of being a beloved children's animated ANIMAL. No matter what look she's giving Simba.

That is all.