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    Why Kevin McCallister Is Not Your Average Kid

    "Is this toothbrush approved by the American Dental Association?"

    1. He grocery shops.

    2. He orders a cheese pizza all by himself.

    Even if it is through trickery.

    3. He decorates the entire house for Christmas.

    4. Kevin prepares a candlelight dinner.

    5. He cares about dental hygiene.

    6. He's chock full of wisdom.

    7. He's not too proud to admit when he's wrong.

    8. Kevin rides in a limousine and drinks soda from a champagne glass.

    9. He's not afraid to explore his sexual curiosities.

    10. He makes friends with people who aren't his age.

    11. He devises a master plan to protect his house, rather than just run away.

    12. Kevin's responsible when it comes to eating and driving.

    13. He knows how to use a credit card.

    14. He uses aftershave.

    15. He's the master of blackmail.

    16. Kevin outsmarts two grown men in the most outlandish ways possible.

    17. He watches mob movies that are certainly not suitable for children.

    Kevin McCallister, you coy son of a gun.