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1. It is entirely plausible that you have a long lost twin.
2. Having a secret handshake with your butler is an absolute must.
3. Leonardo DiCaprio is and always will be a God.
4. Knowing how to play poker could save your life.
5. Revenge can be sweet, literally.
6. Oreos and peanut butter are a glorious combination.
7. Relationships are tough.
8. All you need to pierce someone's ears are a match, a needle, an ice cube, and an apple slice.
9. TRUST NO BITCH.
10. But then again, marrying a vineyard owner doesn't sound like such a bad idea.
11. Crinkling a candy wrapper against the speaker is a foolproof way of ending a call ASAP.
12. If the Merlot you're drinking is a little too robust, try a softer California grape.
13. You can never fool your grandpa...
14. ...or your dog for that matter.
15. Butlers give the best fashion advice.
16. Always take advantage of the complimentary drinks on long-haul flights.
17. Everybody needs a partner in crime.
18. The best romances are not always the most obvious ones.
19. Never underestimate the power of an 11-year-old girl.
20. Nothing is worse than missing an opportunity that may change your life.
21. And, finally, happy endings really are possible.
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