The Apple Announcement, According To The Internet

A totally reasonable and accurate assessment of a serious event.

Things didn't start off too great. The live stream looked like this:

Can't wait to see this image in a higher resolution. #apple #livestream #broken #AppleLive #AppleEvent #iPhone6

Or like this:

luv the new take on flat design RT @kelseydollaghan: Great graphics on the Apple livestream

Or this:

Finally, Tim Cook took the stage to make an important announcement:

Then he revealed the iPhone 6 and the slightly larger 6 Plus.

Everything you need to know about today’s Apple event

It comes with tons of new features.

Just some of the great new features of the #iPhone6 unveiled at the #AppleEvent

But that was all just a lead up to the big announcment: the Apple Watch!

My new #AppleWatch ... So proud. #Apple #AppleLive

This is definitely what it looked like:

It also comes in this style:

Obligatory smartwatch notifications

And this sporty version:

Of course, the Apple Watch instantly had its own, definitely real and official Twitter account.

Customers started thinking of how the watch would affect their real lives.

looks like the moon is in the 7th house and jupiter's aligned with mars, so no, debra, I can't make it to the potluck

Or this luxurious version:

You can keep your Apple Watch, I'd wear this snazzy timepiece if I could.

Possibly for the negative.

"I called your iPad, ur iPhone and your iWatch." IMAGINE coming home to THAT shit lol

Paul Ford and Anil Dash want to pass the watch to their kids one day.

Some people realized the watch has already been around.

A guy from Apple demonstrated how you could draw a message on the phone.

"jeff want to go eat some sushi?"/"jeff are you ready to accept jesus into you heart?"

Or it looked like this:

Then U2 came out and Bono and Tim Cook booped fingers.

vine.co

Whiteness was estimated.

This guy using the Apple watch to get walking directions to Whole Foods was arguably the whitest event of 2014, maybe the decade

Then, recalculated.

Wait, Tim Cook and Bono touching fingers while announcing a free album on iTunes might be whiter I gotta check my reference guide

But the real issues were never addressed.

Apple let's fix the real problem

Let's just always look at the positive:

If you're having a bad day, remember that there's some guy that needs to tell Tim Cook that half the live stream had Chinese dubbing.

Skip to footer