21 Spine-Tinglingly Spooky Tales Of Turning 30

*Flashlight under chin* Listen up, twentysomethings… MUAHAHAHAH

Gather round the campfire, twentysomethings. Prepare yourself to hear the scariest, spookiest, creepiest, most terrifying stories your young mind can imagine…IF YOU DARE.

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1. Five pounds shows up over the holidays……..and it never leaves.

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2. A thirtysomething finally scores a dream apartment in a hip neighborhood……..but all his friends move to the suburbs.

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3. The wrinkle cream that costs $70 a jar……..isn’t working.

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4. A birthday invite arrives, but the party is for……..for a 3-year-old.

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5. And the party is……..2 p.m.–4 p.m. on a Sunday.

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6. The styles from your high school days are coming back……..but only for people barely born then.

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7. Someone you know admits they’ve had Botox……..and you’re more intrigued than repulsed.

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8. A formerly fun-loving and carefree thirtysomething has……..a kid.

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9. Something sinister, something unexplainable happens to that person. They begin to enjoy……..the kid.

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10. The babies on Teen Mom could be……..your grandchildren.

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11. A 34-year-old man chats with a recent college grad at his workplace. Discovers that……..the kid has no idea who Zack Morris is.

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12. Summer rolls around and a couple in their thirties realize they have……..no weddings to go to.

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13. Instead of hearing about new engagements on Facebook, they’re hearing of friends……..getting divorced.

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14. A 36-year-old gets a weird pain in his knee……..and it never goes away.

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15. It’s Sunday morning. A couple in their thirties with nothing to do that day wakes up……..at 6:30 a.m.

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16. The year is 2014. A woman in her thirties only sees her friends……..once a month……..and she’s totally OK with that.

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17. Two friends in their thirties meet at a bar. They ask the bartender……..to turn down the music.

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18. A 37-year-old is discussing movies with his friends……..and he’s only seen Pixar ones in the last six months.

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19. A 31-year-old woman has two glasses of wine and wakes up with……..the worst hangover of her life.

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20. *Turns on classic rock radio*……..Green Day song comes on.

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Dear twentysomething, are you scared beyond belief? Well, there’s one more horrifying TRUE FACT for you:

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21. One day YOU, TOO will……..turn 30.

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