Promoted

Please Come To My Rave

Hi there. It’s me, your next door neighbor Ivan. I just wanted to inform you I’ll be hosting a rave this weekend, and I’d love you to come.

1. Hello neighbor, I found your dog in my yard again. While I’m here, I thought I’d invited you to my rave tomorrow night.

2. I see you have questions about what a rave is.

4. I’ll be dancing like this:

5. There will be the most beautiful ladies there

10. It is a very cool mature event for adults. Like you and me.

15. Wear your finest clothing, this is an event to dress to impress!

18. There will be the coolest DJs playing the most lovely rave music

23. We will abide by the P.L.U.R. rules

24. What is P.L.U.R. you ask? Peace, Love, Unity, Respect!

25. There will be a special chillout room, and also a friend zone. For friends!

26. You don’t need to bring any snacks, we shall feast on the music!

27. Oh yeah, don’t bother showing up until at least after 10pm.

28. Perhaps you shall desire a backrub, and I will be happy to do so for you:

29. Oh, and if it gets noisy, please just let me know instead of calling the cops.

30. See you tonight, gorgeous.

Check out more articles on BuzzFeed.com!

 
 

    Contributions

    Here Are The Top Stories
    • BP has agreed to pay a $18.7 billion fine to settle legal actions over the 2010 Deepwater Horizon oil spill.
    • At least 36 people are dead after a ferry carrying 173 passengers capsized in the Philippines.
    • Tidal is now the only place you can stream Prince's music. He's pulled his work from other services, like Spotify.
    Get The News App

    Hot Buzz

    What’s The Best Undiscovered British TV Show?

    collection

    What’s The Coolest Concert Venue You’ve Ever Been To?

    collection

    Now Buzzing