How To Be A Hacker

One simple trick discovered by a mom to hacking the planet.

1. So, you want to be a hacker

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2. Good choice, because…

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3. You need a really cool flaming mask and a suit

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4. It will help if you’re a hot babe with a really cool haircut

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5. Damn, check out this cool hair

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6. Get some really tiny sunglasses

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7. Or wraparounds

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8. It’s just really really important that you have sunglasses, ok?

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9. You might need like at least 2 computers for doing some cool hacking

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10. A hacker can set up their hacking station anywhere

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11. A hacker needs a good hideout in case the cyberpolice show up

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12. Hackers know basically everything about computers

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13. Internet Explorer? Yeah right. Real hackers use Firefox. Are you a baby or something?

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14. Real hackers know how to read cool green computer “code”

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15. Linux? Yeah. Duh, Linux.

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16. You’ll be breaking into top secret information and stuff

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17. Whoa whoa do NOT mess with these guys!

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18. Look at this guy, I bet he’s up to no good

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19. Look at me, I’m hacking stuff from my cyberlair!

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20. Damn, this ratwolf is also a hacker.

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21. Whoa whoa this is some hacker stuff right here only a true hacker would understand

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22. Congrats! You’re a hacker now!

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23. Welcome 2 your new cyberlyfe.

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Katie Notopoulos is a senior editor for BuzzFeed News and is based in New York. Notopoulos writes about tech and internet culture is cohost of the Internet Explorer podcast.
Contact Katie Notopoulos at

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