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17 Things You Just Can’t Get Open

I don’t even want what’s in here anymore, but now this is about justice.

1. Capri Sun

NOOO

2. Milk cartons

NOT THIS AGAIN

3. CDs

THIS MIGHT NOT BE AN ISSUE MUCH ANYMORE BUT IT STILL HURTS

4. Starburst

IT SHOULDN’T BE THIS HARD TO OPEN A CANDY THAT ISN’T EVEN GOOD

5. Pill bottle foil tops

DON’T MAKE ME STAB THIS

6. Chocolate sauce

ONCE I USE THIS I’LL NEVER BE ABLE TO ACCESS IT AGAIN

7. Voss water

WHAT IS THIS UN-OPENABLE SPACE WATER

8. Old nail polish

DON’T TELL ME TO RUN WATER OVER IT BECAUSE I’VE TRIED THAT

9. Salsa jars

AGAIN, ONCE I EAT THE DELICIOUS SALSA I WON’T BE ABLE TO OPEN THE DELICIOUS SALSA ANYMORE

10. Action figures

FORGET IT HE’S STAYING IN THERE

11. Hot dogs

IF WE ARE NOT CAREFUL THERE COULD VERY EASILY BE A PILE OF HOT DOGS ON THE FLOOR IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE

12. Envelopes

WHO EVEN SENDS SNAIL MAIL ANYMORE, IS THIS VICTORIAN ENGLAND

13. Saran Wrap

ENJOY THIS PICTURE BECAUSE YOU’LL NEVER SEE AN UNWRINKLED/FOLDED-IN-ON-ITSELF PIECE OF PLASTIC WRAP EVER AGAIN

14. Non-twist-off beer bottles

AHHHH WTF THIS IS GOING TO END POORLY

15. Coconut

BUT WHAT IF I DO NOT HAVE A MACHETE, THIS SEEMS DANGEROUS

16. Corked wine bottles

ONLY BUYING SCREW TOPS/BOX WINE FROM NOW ON

17. Light bulbs, or really anything in plastic packaging

THIS WILL RESULT IN BLOOD

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