When You Go On Vacation With Your Boyfriend For The First Time

Ten days. Just the two of you. Chicago to Northern Michigan and back again.

1. It all starts out great. The trip is booked and there is SO much to look forward to.

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2. You are deeply in love. You think: This will be special. This will be a time to bond.

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3. It’s just the two of you. It’ll be 10 days of non-stop romance…

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4. Except, no.

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5. For the first hour or so, life is good.

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6. But then, he decides to talk politics on the SIX HOUR road trip.

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7. …and you come to the realization that he’s literally the worst driver on the face of the earth.

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8. There are EIGHT more days of this?!

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9. Quick fix: Drown your sorrows in fast food. Butterburgers, anyone?

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10. Then you have to deal with the consequences.

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11. But you’re in the middle of nowhere. With toilets that are ill-equipped for the likes of you.

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12. Needless to say, you leave your mark on that lake-side rest stop.

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13. You’re four days in and he won’t stop talking about urban-suburban demographic inversion.

Seriously, it’s a thing.

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14. And one night after dinner he asks you to just bring him a beer, babe.

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15. At this point, when your boyfriend tries to have sex with you, it’s just like:

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16. You’re trying to embrace the concept of non-stop “togetherness”.

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17. But come on, this isn’t how it was supposed to BE!

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18. After 9 days together, it’s like your boyfriend goes from this:

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19. To this.


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20. Or even this.

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21. Clearly, you’ve just had TOO much vacation.

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