1. No longer having a summer break.
There used to be nothing than the last day of school, knowing that you had a great summer full of possibilities ahead of you. Now it’s just 9-5 Monday through Friday. All. Year. Long.
2. Dealing with the heat because you’re worried about the power bill.
As hot as it gets you know that cranking up the A/C will only crank up your bill. Time to get creative with the situation.
3. Being hyper-aware of all the pee in pools and in water parks.
Kids are blissfully unaware, you on the other hand know better.
4. Hearing the ice cream truck go by and knowing you will look like a weirdo if you run after it.
That is why your freezer is already stocked with creamcicles and drumsticks.
5. Getting a sunburn then dealing with it at work.
Not only did mess up with sunscreen, but to add insult to injury you have to work as your burn itches and peels.
6. Being bombarded with pics from your friends awesome vacations.
Way to rub it in, guys.
7. The influx of tourists if you live in a city that attracts them.
First day of summer = first day someone asks, “Can you help me? I’m lost.”
8. Dreading the beach because you know it will be packed.
When you’re a kid this never bothered you, but now it is all you can think of.
9. You’re now that person who warns people about fireworks.
Your insurance deductible is too high to take chances with these little doodads of destruction.
10. The danger that is getting drunk in the sun.
Because in all likelihood you’ll just pass out and get sunstroke.
11. If you have kids, summer is all about making sure they have fun and have stuff to do.
Not that you don’t enjoy that, but it would be nice to have the slip n’ slide all to yourself every now and then.
12. Wearing nice clothes and getting pit stains.
Fancy dinner? Pit stains. Big meeting? Pit stains. Wedding? Pit to the stains.
13. Worrying about your body during bathing suit season.
Does this look OK?
14. Wanting to eat all the yummy snacks you ate as a kid but no longer having the metabolism.
Summer used to mean junk food all day every day, but now it means saving up your Weight Watchers points so you can have a cheeseburger AND hot dog on the 4th of July.
15. Needing to save your vacation days for the holidays.
Because being an adult means having obligations, like spending Christmas with the in-laws instead of heading to Hawaii for two weeks in August.
16. No longer getting excited about summer blockbusters.
No matter how many robots riding dinosaurs they offer, summer movies stop having the same sheen they did when you were twelve.
17. Being reminded that you are getting older with every passing summer.
All summer means is that fall is coming, then winter, then spring, repeating again and again until you die.