TV writer/producer/author Ali Adler spent years working with straight men in various writers rooms. As a gay woman, she was able to give them unique insight on female sexuality — and decided to publish a book with some of her advice:
Here are some of her tips:
1.“Here is the most important Vagina Golden Rule. Do not do unto it as you would have done unto you. Everything about you is very different from a woman.”
2.“Gentle to slightly rougher, never too rough — unless she passionately screams at you to do otherwise — that’s the build. In all of this. The whole thing."
3.[From John Stamos]: “With women, you have to listen to their bodies. Not just listen to them say out loud, ‘That feels good, no, that doesn’t feel good,’ but listen to their actual bodies."
4."You must behave as if her vagina is the greatest thing you’ve ever smelled, tasted, and had the privilege to be near. She must believe that she is letting you eat the Cinnabon that is attached to her body.”
5.“DO NOT SEND A PHOTO OF YOUR GENITALS, EVER."
6."Despite what you may think, the clitoris is nothing at all like a tiny penis. Please don’t think it is, even if, biologically, it originated from the same bundle of tissue in utero. Generally speaking, it doesn’t want hard friction."
7.“A kiss should most usually start soft — no tongue at first — and just like sex, it should build in intensity...your tongue is not a Mars rover; it is not an exploration device programmed to bring saliva samples back to NASA.”
8.“Don’t fix. Just listen. This is so difficult, but it is so essential. Think of your penis not as a screwdriver, but as a microphone.”
9.“Never stop evaluating yourself. Don’t stop growing or changing in our ever-evolving world. Don’t be afraid to ask yourself those very tough questions.”
