1. The Crowd (Including Michelle Obama) Sang “Happy Birthday” To A Kid
2. LeBron James Screamed “BOOM” As He Threw Down An Alley Oop
3. Tony Parker Wore Awesome Goggles
He has to wear them as a result of an eye injury sustained in the Drake-Chris Brown club fight. No, seriously.
4. The Floor Mics Picked Up A Lot Of Trash Talk And Cursing
It’s cool to hear how these guys actually talk on the floor, rather than the Disneyfied version.
5. Creepy LeBron Was Creepy
6. Kobe Wasn’t Having Fun Even Though The US Was Up By 14
7. James Harden Did His Michael Jordan Impression
8. Kobe Finally Had Fun And Was Adorable With LeBron
9. Sideline Reporter Craig Sager Wore Normal Clothes
10. Carmelo Gave Kevin Seraphin A Great Big Hug
Every single thing about this picture looks uncomfortable. I love it so much that I would tell it that I would match any offer it received up to a billion dollars and then I would follow through on that promise. You know, just to pull a metaphor out of the air.
11. Everyone Scored, Even The College Kid
Fear the brow, indeed.
12. The Entire Team Lined Up To Hug Michelle Obama One-By-One After The Win
13. Oh Yeah, They Totally Dominated France
Kevin Durant: 22 points, 9 rebounds.
Kevin Love: 14 points, 3 rebounds.
Kobe Bryant: 10 points.
LeBron James: 9 points, 8 assists, and 5 rebounds.
Carmelo Anthony: 9 points, 9 rebounds.
Tyson Chandler: 8 points, 9 rebounds.