The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's Mean OkCupid Article
Gizmodo writer Alyssa Bereznak went on an OkCupid date with a man named Jon Finkel. He was a seemingly nice guy, who just happened to be a top level professional poker player, but more notably a former Magic: The Gathering world champion. Ms. Bereznak found this too nerdy for her tastes and decided to write an article about her “horror story.” The Internet was not happy. Here are the 10 best reactions.
Just like you're obligated to mention you're divorced or have a kid in your online profile, shouldn't someone also be required to disclose any indisputably geeky world championship titles? But maybe it was a long time ago? We met for round two later that week.
At dinner I got straight down to it. Did he still play? "Yes." Strike one. How often? "I'm preparing for a tournament this weekend." Strike two. Who did he hang out with? "I've met all my best friends through Magic." Strike three. I smiled and nodded and listened. Eventually I even felt a little bit bad that I didn't know shit about the game. Here was a guy who had dedicated a good chunk of his life to mastering Magic, on a date with a girl who can barely play Solitaire. This is what happens, I thought, when you leave things out of your online profile.
I later found out that Jon infiltrated his way into OKCupid dates with at least two other people I sort of know, including one of my co-workers. Mothers, warn your daughters! This could happen to you. You'll think you've found a normal bearded guy with a job, only to end up sharing goat cheese with a guy who takes you to a one-man show based on Jeffrey Dahmer's life story.
Maybe I'm an OKCupid asshole for calling it that way. Maybe I'm shallow for not being able to see past Jon's world title. I'll own that. But there's a larger point here: that judging people on shallow stuff is human nature; one person's Magic is another person's fingernail biting, or sports obsession, or verbal tic. No online dating profile in the world is comprehensive enough to highlight every person's peccadillo, or anticipate the inane biases that each of us lugs around. There's no snapshot in the world that can account for our snap judgments.
So what did I learn? Google the shit out of your next online date. Like, hardcore.
1. A Record Setting Ask Me Anything Thread On Reddit
The thread was one of the fastest rising in the history of reddit.
2. This Edit To Jon Finkel's Wikipedia Page
It's of course been removed. But it shows where people's heads are at. I have to admit, I'm actually starting to feel bad for Ms. Bereznak. But the article she wrote was unnecessarily cruel.
3. Twitter Hashtag: #SignsYouMayBeDatingAGizmodoWriter
Gizmodo was actually a good sport and did a post about these on their site.
4. Alyssa Bereznak Became Her Own Meme
A photo of the offending writer got the meme treatment, currently with 89 variations on quickmeme.
5. She Also Became Other Memes (Like Scumbag Alyssa Bereznak)
Scumbag Steve gets repurposed with a picture of the offending writer.
6. And As Is Typical Other Memes Had Things To Say About Her
Well her and pretty much every other meme.
7. Nerdpuddle's Awesome Parody Of The Article
A sample below. The whole thing here.
Earlier this morning I came home drunk AGAIN and made an OK Cupid profile because I’d overheard some people at the bar I live at frequent discussing something called the internet. They were obviously nerds so I punched them in the butt, drank my lemon drop shot and stumbled out the door thinking to myself, “I miss High School”.
The first few million thousand responses I got after logging onto OK Cupid were soooo depressing. “I can’t spell – want to make fun of me?” “You are obvs way too good to be doing this” and “OMG PRETTY PRINCESS OMG YOU ARE ONE!!!!1111 HOW DID YOU GET THAT WAY TALK MORE PLEASE” I mean, ha! I know all those things, duh. But then one caught my eye, “Hi, I am normal. I might not talk about your panties”. So he wasn’t perfect but obviously I was pretty excited.
8. Gizmodo Australia's Vicious Response
Gizmodo's foreign site had some choice words for Ms. Bereznak.
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32 Responses So Far
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- brendanmoore thinks The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... is Dios MiO & LOL
- fabianw thinks The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... is Geeky
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jizzmodo.
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- jbrim thinks The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... is Win
- 548 The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's...
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In Defense of Jon Finkel …. Can Someone Be Too Nerdy to Date? The story makes me mad but I still have to ask…Yes it's shallow but should we hate Alyssa for it?
- taraist thinks The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... is LOL & Win
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That guy really dodged the bullet with this one. I'd choose a “nerdy” guy any day of the week. They know how to use their light sabers and are good with young padawons.
- deimmunization thinks The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... is Win
- Daniel R. The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... and thinks it’s LOL & Win
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Ok she is very rude.
- tiffanym9 The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... and thinks it’s LOL, WTF & Win
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- Ohyn The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's...
- cap_gun_girl thinks The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... is Win
- wonderfaux thinks The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... is Geeky
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1) She seriously said no to this guy because he's a world champion player of a card game? We all have that one dorky thing we're obsessed with. And it's not like he loves kicking puppies for fun; He plays a card game as a hobby! That's no reason to bash someone. 2) Writing an article and disclosing the subject's name and other highly specific details is messed up. Besides it being morally crappy, it eliminates whatever journalistic integrity she had. I'd fire her.
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whatever to her , nerds are hot , and hes not bad looking , chicks for sure missing out
- johnt20 thinks The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... is Win
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- sword7 thinks The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... is Win
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I know I'm late to the game, but M:TG is great fun. So WTF.
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- Dbailey2 thinks The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... is Win
- “jon finkel gizmodo” is a hot search term for this page
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She calls this non story a “cautionary tale”. What exactly is “cautionary” about going on a date and deciding not to pursue a relationship? I'd reserve that phrase for a date that ended in a near assault or something. Fuck Gizmodo for running her shit article. I've already removed all of the Gawker sites from my RSS and I'm writing Gizmodo to tell them why.
- Dane H. The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... and thinks it’s LOL
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- jacksoncook thinks The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... is Geeky, Win & LOL
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I was hoping Boogie2988's rant would be on here.
- forumserver.twoplustwo.com readers just made The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... more viral
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I think I know the perfect guy for this scumbag: http://inthewarbetween.blogspot.com/2011/03/peter-coffin-you-sad-sorry-sonofabitch.html
- Emily G. thinks The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... is LOL
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Did she disclose in her OKCupid profile that she was going to write about the date for Gizmodo?
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Wouldn't be a deal breaker for me. Since I've never played magic the gathering, I would hope his other nerd interests align with mine ie. Star Trek (TNG,DS9), anime/manga, and british tv shows.
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- adamsdayoff The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's... and thinks it’s Win
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And they wonder why we don't listen to them.
- Annie B. The 8 Best Reactions To Gizmodo's...
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Reminds me of the article a while back about the one night stand with Quentin Tarantino
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He has his own wikipedia entry. She doesn't. I remember when I realized my boyfriend had his own wikipedia I was stoked. Maybe I am too nerdy for this conversation, but she doesn't know what she is doing or who she was writing for. What a bitch.
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I'm sorry to say this, however she isn't god's gift herself on top of being a grade A bitchbucket. I've seen better faces on broken clocks.
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What a bitch! She wrote all the details on a major site and didn't even bother to protect his privacy by giving him an alias. What a “journalist”! Plus, what the hell does Gizmodo has to do with her bad date? Seems more like Jezebel material. Ugh, I stopped reading Gawker a long time ago because their writers are just insufferable and do not have any journalistic integrity whatsoever. They write a lot of misinformation and don't even bother to retract it when truth comes out.
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Dear Alyssa, this is why you are single.
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I never got Magic, but this guy sounds awesome. I'd totally go out with him. Wouldn't kick him out of bed, either.

































