The Official Ranking Of The Top Eleven Players In College Football

*According to some videogame nerds.

2. Every year, the sports nerd-gods at EA Sports assign a numerical ranking to every D-1 college player who appears in the NCAA Football franchise.

*Well, to a nameless college football video-game character that happens to have the same number and attributes as one specific college football player in the real world. One musn’t forget that this is an amateur sport that creates no revenue whatsoever.

ID: 1268546

3. Per the infallible judgments of these nerd-gods, the following are the eleven most-talented scholar-athletes who will play college football next year.

*And remember, we’re inferring that the University of South Carolina DE #7 is in fact All-American University of South Carolina Defensive End Jadaveon Clownney. In fact, it could really be any superstar South Carolina Defensive End who is 6’6” and weighs 275 pounds and has dreadlocks.

ID: 1268567

4. Behold, ye mighty, and despair!

ID: 1268571

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Joe Bernstein is a senior technology reporter for BuzzFeed News and is based in New York. Bernstein reports on and writes about the gaming industry and web culture.
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