14 Unbelievable True Stories About Taylor Swift Songs

As it turns out, Taylor has extremely specific deal breakers. Don’t you dare whistle through your nose.

1. “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together”

Most people think this song is about Jake Gyllenhaal. And it is. It was inspired by a time when Gyllenhaal ate a Kit-Kat bar without breaking the pieces apart, just bit right into the whole thing like an animal.

2. “Red”

This song sounds like it might be another tale of torrid love with Gyllenhaal, but it’s actually about a time Conor Kennedy spilled an entire soda at a restaurant.

3. “Dear John”

This song is obviously about John Mayer. Specifically, it’s about how Mayer pushed Swift to the edge by pronouncing “library” like “libary.”

4. “Mean”

This song is often thought to be about a cranky music critic, but the initial inspiration was actually a Starbucks barista who gave Swift a weird look when all she did was ask for almond milk.

5. “You’re Not Sorry”

This song is about how Joe Jonas makes a faint whistling noise through his nose when he breathes.

6. “I Knew You Were Trouble”

Swift briefly dated Les Miserables actor Eddie Redmayne. This song is about his dumb British accent.

7. “Enchanted”

This song is about the time Adam Young of Owl City gave Swift a jar of ladybugs.

8. “Back to December”

This one is for Glee’s Cory Monteith. Also a big-time nose whistler.

9. “The Moment I Knew”

This song reflects on a tragic time when Zac Efron ordered a Frangelico and ginger ale and called it a “Pennsylvania Dove Crusher.”

10. “Teardrops on My Guitar”

Of course Swift didn’t always date celebrities. This earlier single is about the impossible heartbreak that comes when a guy named Drew who drives a Saturn chooses another girl.

11. “The Story of Us”

This song was inspired by all the times when Taylor Lautner just would not stop referring to himself as “Tim the Tool Man Taylor Lautner.”

12. “You Belong with Me”

This tender song of yearning was actually written about a bag of jet-puffed marshmallows.

13. “Love Story”

This song was 10% inspired by the work of Shakespeare and 90% inspired by a squirrel with “inquisitive eyes.”

14. “Alone on a Boat” (Future album????)

If Taylor Swift writes a song with this title, just know that it’s almost certainly about One Direction singer Harry Styles. Alternate title: “Dumb British Accent.”

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