1. Chris Rock
Because we’re all dying to know the details for Grown Ups 2.
What are you thoughts on Chris Tucker?
Is David Spade really, you know, like that in real life?
Is your Kanye West “Blame Game” outro monologue based on a real girl? If so, can I have her number?
2. Howard Stern
Nothing says “great guest” like a 6’4” rock and roll Jesus who made his fortune off a version of Girls Gone Wild that airs ON THE RADIO. Come on.
Has Ozzy ever wandered onto the set of America’s Got Talent while having an acid flashback?
Do you have trouble getting in and out of most rooms?
How much have you cumulatively spent on bail for Artie Lange?
3. Gary Busey
Gary Busey is insane. He once imitated farm animals during a late night appearance.
Are you going to hurt me?
Is that hair real?
Do you invite your lawyer to Christmas dinner?
4. Tracy Morgan
Tracy is notorious for taking his shirt off on talk shows, so prepare your eyeballs for that. He essentially plays a parody of himself on 30 Rock, which, if you’ve watched, is saying a lot.
Are you allergic to shirts?
Did you really once ask your doctor for sweatpants money?
5. Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert… together.
Was there ever a more dynamic duo of pundits? Put these two in the same room, and watch the sarcasm happen. This is why people don’t vote.
What was your favorite moment in the 2012 Presidential debates?
Do you guys ever hang out in real life? Who wears the pants?
Can you guys do a song together, or something?
6. Mike Tyson
It’s a pleasure just to hear him speak. And someone will inevitably ask him how that ear tasted. IF ANDY COHEN CAN DO IT, ANYONE CAN.
Did you try and stop the lawsuit concerning your face tattoo on Ed Helms in The Hangover 2?
Who is your favorite friend on Friends?
Have you tried to capitalize on today’s zombie craze, because, you know, you’re famous for eating human flesh? Don’t punch me.
7. Honey Boo-Boo
Schadenfreude at its absolute worst.
No really, why?
Can you put down the spaghetti, please?
He’s the Donald Trump of rapping, but with more hair.
Does Beyonce ever ask if she is the 100th problem?
Are you going to redesign the uniforms for The Islanders too?
Will you sign my face?
9. The Entire Cast of The Real Housewives of Atlanta At The Same Time
Do we even need to explain?
Can you just tell us upfront why you already hate the new cast members?
Hey Kim, how’s the music career going?
Can you guys just talk amongst yourselves until someone starts shaking their head violently?
10. Big Bird
Big Bird’s recent appearance on late night TV seems to suggest there is a larger conversation to have with our oversized aviary-dwelling friend.
Have you started sending resumes in to other streets?
Have you considered a career as a center in the NBA?
Do you ever want to punch Elmo?