The 14 Most Awkward Social Situations On Trains & What To Do

We’ve all been there…

1. The Train Weirdo

Via Tumblr

Uh-oh. You thought you were on the quiet carriage but someone is freaking out and doing weird s***.

What to do:
- Wear headphones at all times. If you can’t hear them then they aren’t there.
- Hope someone much bigger than you tells them to go away.

Awkward rating: 8/10

2. *Beep Beep* Doors Closing

tumblr.com / Via Tumblr

Do I? Don’t I? The beeps have just gone and there’s people around you waiting to see what you will do. Do you look like a hero with an awesome jump through the doors as they go or risk your bag getting caught and looking like a tw*t?

What To Do:
- Always wait for the next train. People will think “F*** that guy must be cool, he just gets the train when he wants!”

Awkward rating: 5/10

3. The Sleeping Passenger

Via @SleepyCommuters

One that people are more familiar with but what happens when you’re the guy on the right, you’re awake and you need to get off? Do you look like the bad guy by waking them from their delicious sleep? Or climb over the table and once again look like an oddball?

What to do:

- Hit the back of their seat really hard so they wake up on their own and don’t have clue what happened! #Easy

Awkward rating: 3/10

4. Help! Those Chavs Keep Looking At Me

youtube.com / Via YouTube

It’s a tricky one. Do you yell in their face and shock them into leaving you alone or play it cool? It might also depend on numbers. You could always just stare back? But wait, they’re just kids and there’s a fitty sat near you who will think you’re a wuss if you don’t do something.

What to do:
- Sit there and put on your best ‘hard’ face. They might get scared and start harassing someone weaker looking.
- If that fails, be weird. Yes you risk being the train weirdo but it will make the chavs lose their s*** and you will look all mysterious. There’s even a slim chance the fitty finds you charming and funny.

Awkward rating: 9/10

5. People Making Out Next To You

It’s a tough one. If you move away they might notice and ask “why?” leading to an even more embarrassing situation. He could also say something like “Is my girl not pretty enough?” then you are in for a world of hurt.

What to do:
- Sit quietly, look outside and pretend you’re too cool to even notice what’s happening as you’re such a stud this thing happens to you all the time.

Awkward rating: 6/10

6. Farts!

Via YouTube

Dodgy curry? Big night out? A bit of trapped wind? Whatever it may be we’ve all been there.

What to do:

- Hold it in! There is no possible situation where this will work unless you are sat near a tramp who reeks of urine and other substances.

Awkward rating: 5/10 (Purely for the cramps)

7. Dropped Change

Via Flickr

You’re walking off the train and whoops you hear a coin drop - but you’re in a rush! How much is the right amount to stop and pick up?

What to do:

- If it’s bronze then leave it! 1ps and 2ps just ain’t worth it and will make you look a cheapskate
- If it’s 5p or 10p - see how many people are around and grab if you can, try and kick it further down carriage first so they might not see.
- 20p+ - You’d look silly and cause others to bring your attention to the fact you dropped money, thus creating more awkwardness.

Awkward rating: 5/10

8. Wanting To Take Pictures Of Lookalikes

pbs.twimg.com / Via Twitter

Hey is that Ben Affleck? So you’ve seen a wicked lookalike that you want to share with your friends online? But what if they see you taking it….you are gonna be left red-faced for sure.

What to do:
- Make some facial expressions at your phone to give the impression you’re reading a witty text from your cousin and then snap with the camera. #JobDone. (Only do when the person sat next to you is occupied too or else they may squeal on you)

Awkward rating: 2/10

9. Is She Pregnant Or Just Fat?

Via LiveLeak

Do you give up your seat and be the nice guy to the pregnant lady or do you cause massive offence when you realise she’s just overweight?

What to do:
- Get up! You can always say you’re just being nice anyway and then everyone thinks you’re a perfect gent rather than a moron.

Awkward rating: 7/10

10. The Crying Woman

pbs.twimg.com / Via Twitter

Should I leave her to it or offer a shoulder to cry on?

What to do:
- Offer a tissue. Yes the inoffensive tissue. You’re not asking for her to spill the beans and so don’t run the risk of having to sit listening for 25 minutes about how Brad slept with the cleaner’s sister’s best friend’s neighbour. Result!

Awkward rating: 6/10

11. You’re On The Drunk Train

Via CBS

Everyone’s smashed but you ain’t!

What to do:
- Stay clear of the aggressive drunks or one’s who look like they might hurl at any moment and sit near the fun ones. You might even get involved in their banter. FYI - they will be either slightly geeky or some posh toff who had his first sip or Chablis in weeks.

Awkward rating: 7/10

12. Reading Over The Shoulder

Via Derek Berwin / Getty Images

Wait, what was that about half price Oranges at Tesco? We’re all victims of this annoying habit but it’s even worse when you get caught in the act.

What to do:
- Never let them see. You’ve always got to be one step ahead.
- Don’t get caught in the article. Read a headline and move away, headline move away. It’s like a firing range target practice…sort of.

Awkward rating: 3/10

13. Been Caught Staring

Via YouTube

Whoops! Yep, he/she just saw you blatantly checking them out.

What To Do:
- This video is about the only logical solution.
- Quickly pretend to answer your phone and start a conversation that makes you sound interesting.

Awkward rating: 7/10

14. Headphone Breathing Paranoia

Via Facebook

There’s even a Facebook group for it. You’re there calmly minding your own business listening to your music and all of a sudden your breath sounds really loud. WTF?

What to do:
- Turn the tunes down really slowly and check (99% of the time it will be a false alarm)
- Don’t try breathing slowly or else you may pass out!

Awkward rating: 4/10

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