27 Suburban Kid Problems

Life is hard. Well, in retrospect, maybe not.

2. Whether to have your prom dinner here…

4. And what kind of milkshake to get here after:

5. Waiting until you were 16 for TOTAL FREEDOM.

6. But — can’t afford a car? Guess what: It’s REALLY hard to get anywhere.

7. Because walking anywhere would take three hours.

8. Which $1.50 movie to see (or maybe you should see two!).

9. Trying to explain why high school football was the BIGGEST DEAL.

10. Figuring out the most awesome way to turn around in a cul-de-sac.

11. What movie to see every Friday and Saturday night, because there was nothing else to do.

12. Making sure you always had one of these for your car:

13. Wasting $5 on a Frappuccino at the Starbucks drive-through.

14. What you would do if you ever had to parallel park, i.e., PANIC.

15. What to do after this closed for the night:

16. And how scary it would be if this ever closed:

17. Or, oh god, THIS:

18. How to not get caught making out in a car.

19. Getting your friend who worked at Target to give you a discount.

20. How to get the cigarette smell out of your clothes and hair after leaving one of these.

21. How long to hang out in the parking lot until someone had to go home.

23. Figuring out how to not always end up here with your friends.

24. Driving two hours to get to a concert.

25. How to afford a giant ice cream sundae at Friendly’s.

26. Which Dave Matthews CD to blast when driving around with your friends.

27. How to game the Costco lady to give you more free samples.

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