2. “Whew, that reading assignment only took me six hours instead of eight.”
3. To your nieces and nephews: “I’m kind of in the 20th grade.”
7. “Of course, professor, let me explain this part of my prospectus to you.”
9. “I’ve been up for long enough that this actually counts as my first coffee of TODAY.”
18. “I’m going to kill whoever checked out the book I need from the library.”
Here Are The Top Stories
- Police in Athens used pepper spray on protesters two days ahead of Greece's major bailout vote.
- A medical helicopter crashed in Colorado. The crash killed the pilot and injured two crew members.