10 Signs That Rick Ross Is A Lyrical Idiot

Recently, Rick Ross has gotten in major trouble for his allusion to raping women in his song "U.O.E.N.O." Reebok, who had been sponsoring Ross, has since decided to drop the rapper for failing to "live up to the values of the brand." I'm not too shocked at Ross' lyrical gaffe because he has never really been much of an intelligent wordsmith...to say the least. Here are ten examples of how straight up stupid Ricky Rosé's lyrics are.

1. I Love My Bitches: "Am I really just a narcissist/ Cause I wake up to a bowl of Lobster bisque?"

No, you're just fat.

2. I'm Only Human: "Got a deadbeat dad, but he far from dead/He never knew chocolate milk make you fart real bad"

Rosé is trying to dig a little deeper than usual and discuss his poor upbringing. But I'm not sure that knowing chocolate milk makes children gassy is the tell-tale sign of a good father. I could just be ignorant as to what constitutes proper parenting, correct me if I'm wrong.

3. Triple Beam Dreams: "Home invasions, ducktape/Fornicating, counting money with a fuck face"

Rick, you're a billionaire. You have no need for home invasions or duck tape. Moreover, if you have your choice to count your money with anyone, why would you want to count it with a fuck face? I usually prefer to count my money with close friends and family instead of a fuck face.

4. Holy Ghost: "When I fuck she let the pussy soak/ Even my lawyer be askin is it dope"

That's just really unprofessional. I would have expected a prestigious attorney to have far more respect for such personal matters.

5. Pirates: "Fascination with fortune afford me mansion and Porsches/Panoramas, abortions, marijuana imported"

Your fascination with fortune has allowed you to buy panoramas and imported weed? Cool!

Oh, and abortions too? Significantly less cool.

6. Amsterdam: "I'm laughing at the people who label me poor/ Now I piss on Europeans, you'd think it was porn"

I mean, I guess you could think that was porn... assuming that you're a big fan of Norwegian Golden Showers?

7. Ring Ring: "She in cribs with elevators, as well as water fountains"

My elementary school had both elevators and water fountains. This crib does not sound super impressive.

8. Tears of Joy: "Last night I cried tears of joy/What did I do to deserve this/Vacheron on my wrist, a year ago/I didn't even know that bitches exist"

First of all, the idea of Rick Ross crying tears of joy is hilarious.

But more importantly, a year ago you "didn't know bitches exist?" So before you were famous, you weren't aware of women? Just not at all? I don't believe you, Rick.

9. Sixteen: "She say my heart cold, I'm naming my son December"

Don't do that. December Ross is a really, really weird name for a kid.

10. Retrosuperfuture: "Fuckin like its a porn in my recliner/ Lookin straight in the eyes, they show vagina"

I have nothing to say about this. I'm genuinely just perplexed.