1.
Margaret didn't think it was the right time to tell Betty about the wave headed her way.
2.
As his friends enjoyed the water, Fred yelled "shark!", because Fred was a dick.
3.
That was the day Gertrude decided she hated the beach.
4.
Despite looking for hours, the children could not find Nemo.
5.
Sybil was unsure of Mary's latest attempt to avoid wrinkles.
6.
When a wave washed their lunch away, the boys conceded an ocean picnic wasn't the best idea they'd ever had.
7.
Paul was convinced his mother was deliberately trying to humiliate him.
8.
Gerard couldn't understand why the water kept seeping out of the hole in the bottom of his bucket.
9.
It only took three minutes for Basil to realise Bondi was most definitely overrated.
10.
Alf immediately regretted asking his mates to check his tan lines.
11.
Sally just wanted to go home and have a nap, if she was being honest.
12.
When the priest offered to help with the fishing, the nuns scoffed. "Sisters," they told him, "are doing it for themselves."
13.
Billy and Graham clearly didn't think this through.
14.
Discussion that afternoon focused on subtle ways to pick out a wedgie.
15.
Winifred didn't get the joke.
16.
This new cocktail they'd been sold tasted suspiciously like air.
17.
Christopher giggled with the secret knowledge he'd stuck a pin in each of his friend's air beds.
18.
Helen didn't have the heart to tell Peter it wasn't bicep size that mattered.
19.
They'd followed all the instructions and taken the canoes to water, so Fred and Thomas couldn't figure out why their paddles weren't working.
20.
Elizabeth was getting real tired of the children's whining.
21.
Dorothy found out the hard way that she couldn't actually fly.
22.
Bob didn't get the memo.
23.
As the nine-year-old stared at her, Janet realised too late the beach was not the best place to practice Kama Sutra.
