It sounds like you and I grew up in the same type of family Jamieleet. I DO have kids. Four teenagers, and they are ROUGH! But I completely agree with ‘early intervention’ My youngest is a few months shy of 16. There is no way in HELL she will be attending ‘multiple back to school parties’ without my first checking with the owners of the homes she will be at for said parties. She WILL check in with me in the event she will be changing locations and I will know who she’s with. I will have discussions with parents, prior to and during the event, and my ever vigilent husband wil likely do a few ‘drive bys’ as he did with the other three. (this is in the event she even suggests such a thing and we don’t get that ;gut feeling’ and scrap the plan before it even starts) How do I know all of this to be true, because that’s how I raised my children and it’s called DEFENSIVE parenting. You’re damn right I’ll know where my kids are, that’s MY JOB! Do they test boundries in an effort to gain some independence? Sure. Will they step out of line. Absolutely! Have her older siblings? Oh yes, definitely. Do we let them occasionally make a jackass decision (non life threatening mind you) knowing they’ll regret it later, yep. They, as with each one of us, face the consequences of their actions if they chose to make poor choices. Once they’re out they need to learn mommy and daddy can’t get them out of things. What these boys did was wrong, and if it was one of my boys I would be so ashamed, those parents must be wondering where they went wrong. And if she was my daughter … I’d be pretty ashamed to, not just of her drunken night out, but of me and her father. She’s 16, it’s our job to protect them, even if the country tells them we’re too conservative, or controlling, or over protective. That’s what parents are supposed to do!!! Why didn’t her mother or father know how obliterated she was? Why didn’t they check in with her, check up on her, annoy the hell out of her throughout her day so she might not have ever had the opportunity to get to the point where she was such an easy target? Not victim blaming, so chill, but there are ALWAYS consequences for the decisions we make, sometimes dished out by those who have absolutely NO RIGHT to do so. She chose to get drunk off her ass (no she didn’t CHOOSE rape), the boys CHOSE to take advantage of that (horrible, horrible choice on their part- not just because they got caught)… This whole thing is just sad. I’m sad this is what our CHILDREN are doing.

No I do not have kids. But I am basing my statements based on the lessons i learned from my parents long ago. I did not have sex until I was 18, and I did not drink until I was done with high school. These were choices I made that were morally instilled into me. Im not saying this to be on some high horse of teenage conduct, but I am sure people might assume the ol’ “Well if you dont have kids then you aint got no idea what your talkin about!” Well, I may not. Maybe I am just assuming. But If I could grow up in a household that had great family values and make good choices, then anybody else can. ANYWAYS, Do you guys really think that the parents are not at fault? They were 16 years old. Still under the care and supervision of their parents or legal guardians, this means that they are products of the level of parenting they received.  Example: You are in good ol Wal Mart, and you see a mother and her son walking around. The son is acting like a hooligan and kicking people in the cashiers line. The mother is texting on her phone, or what have you. Do you think “Man what a shitty little kid” Or “those people shouldnt have been standing there” or lastly, “That woman needs to get off her damn phone and get this brat under control.” I understand that this is a entirely different situation, but at the end of the day, they were kids. impressionable, stupid kids.

Do you actually have children? Because believe me, we all have these grand ideas of what kind of parent we will be… and then we have kids.

Yes, I absolutely agree that the best lessons are taught early and often, and lovingly. My point, though, is that teenagers are going to be, well, teenagers. At some point most kids are going to do something “forbidden” just to see how it feels.

Oh! well i guess i would need lazer fences to keep my hypothetical daughter in check instead of actual parenting being accomplished at an early state.

So this hypothetical daughter of yours… when she’s sixteen, you’ll be monitoring her movements every hour of the day? Sounds like a successful parenting strategy.