1. Friends don’t come with a price tag.
And if they do, you need new friends.
3. You don’t need a fancy vacation to have a good time.
There is nothing like going to the local park with your friends and gossiping about last night.
4. Your Anchorman 2 ticket is only going to cost like $12.
6. Beer is cheap
And everybody loves beer. Oh, you don’t like beer?
7. Drinkable wine starts at $10 a bottle.
Did I say $10? I meant $4.
9. Because hard work pays off in more than just $$$.
…such as experience, self-fulfillment, and popularity (duh).
… unless what you love to do is this.
Except technically Huell was on the clock at this moment so he got paid to do this.
11. A Netflix subscription is reasonably priced.
Welcome to everything worth watching ever.
13. Music isn’t free… anymore…
… but Spotify is!
and songza and 8tracks and grooveshark and turntable.fm and pandora and…
14. Because money will actually make you crazy.
Because drugs guys.
16. Cause money ain’t nothing but the money when you get to the money it ain’t nothing but money.
says Miley Cyrus in Love, Money, Party (featuring Big Sean).
17. It costs nothing to contemplate the Big Questions.
No, because coats aren’t designed to be worn while sitting down #duh