1. Anything knitted by anyone:
…it’s impossible to throw out gifts when this much time and effort have been put into them.
2. Family heirlooms:
…the only way to get rid of these is by dying.
3. Especially if that something “survived the war”:
…forget about it.
4. Something with a kid’s handwriting on it:
…letters don’t look this cute forever.
5. Handmade art by kids:
…double attachment points when there’s a creative use of the medium.
6. Decorations “that would go so well in your place”:
…be prepared to always have that hanging up whenever the gifter visits.
7. A personalized coupon book:
…you have no choice but to spend these or hide them in your sock drawer for a hundred years.
8. Someone’s self-portrait:
…throwing it away is like throwing them away. Nope. Keep it forever in a special place under a million stacks of paper on your desk.
9. Pets (NOT THAT YOU WOULD EVER WANT TO)
…because they are for life and forever adorable.
…as long as you have flesh, this gift is gonna be around.
11. A poem written especially for you:
The words that fill a page can never fill your garbage.