A Lemur Stole This Woman's Fur-Trimmed Hood And Had Sex With It

    "The hood was just fucked."

    Ishmael N. Daro
    by Ishmael N. Daro

    BuzzFeed Social News Editor, Canada

    Here's the harrowing story of how two women in Nova Scotia were attacked by primates, and how one of those primates had sex with the hood of an expensive winter coat.

    The barn was "in the middle of nowhere in rural Nova Scotia" and had cages of monkeys, reptiles, and other animals. DeBad was Snapchatting most of the visit, and she captured the first attack on video.

    "Then I was backing up away from her but I got too close to the other monkey," DeBad said.

    That other animal, Zorro, grabbed the hood of DeBad's parka and was clawing at her neck, she said. The hood was attached only by clasp buttons, and Zorro managed to detach it from the rest of the coat.

    Alexis DeBad

    "He ran away with my hood and I was screaming," DeBad said. "I was laughing hysterically and also crying because I was feeling very emotional.

    "He's gonna take it in there, protect it, probably have sex with it," the caretaker told DeBad. "There's gonna be cum all over it and he's really violent and you're probably never going to get it back.'"

    Moose Knuckles Canada / Via mooseknucklescanada.com

    DeBad's coat is an expensive Moose Knuckles parka and the hood comes lined with blue fox fur.

    "I was thinking maybe the monkey's pissed because I was wearing animal fur. Like maybe he was thinking it was his brethren and I was a wrongdoer."

    Meanwhile, in a scene reminiscent of the Planet of the Apes, all the other primates started screaming in their own cages, making an unholy racket seemingly in celebration of the theft.

    The caretaker was able to lure Zorro closer with some food and did manage to retrieve the hood. DeBad said it was "covered in goo" and other substances, and turned spiky and discoloured when it dried.

    Alexis DeBad

    "The hood was just fucked," DeBad said.

    DeBad said she and Elliott can laugh about the attack now, but saving the hood might prove difficult.

    Alexis DeBad

    "The hood was just fucked," DeBad said.

    DeBad said she and Elliott can laugh about the attack now, but saving the hood might prove difficult.

    Alexis DeBad

    "The hood was just fucked," DeBad said.

    DeBad said she and Elliott can laugh about the attack now, but saving the hood might prove difficult.

    "I don't know what I'm taking away from this. Don't buy expensive jackets and go into barns with monkeys?"

    UPDATE

    While DeBad was told it was a spider monkey that attacked her, readers have pointed out that based on the photo it was most likely a lemur. Lemurs are primates, but not monkeys.