Is it any wonder Germans were spoiling for a fight against other people for once?

On the bright side, we now know how to bring Waldo out of hiding. Just blast a cannonball through his parents' bedroom. I just hope he wasn't cold without his hat on.

Well, it's pretty good, I guess. I might have liked it better had I actually seen Space Jam at some point.

And that's how the 1% stay the 1%.

Or grasp the concept of using commas, periods and semicolons to separate clauses. :P

You think he knocked up his daughter?  You sick, sick bastard.

I'm not saying that she is or is not, but anyone with a kid knows that it's possible for poo to migrate all over the place in there once it comes out.

We typically eat the whole bag of salad. It's almost the ideal amount for a family of four. And if it's too much for you because you're single and have no kids, then what the fuck are you doing eating salad anyway?

Hef might be the only man J-Woww has not spread for.

gets no funeral.

I don't know who this is.

I recognize the middle one from the Sonic commercials. You know, back when Sonic ran decent ads that consisted of more than carhops acting superior because Burger King doesn't have foot-long chili-cheese dogs and Sonic does.

I'd hit it. Might have to bust out a razor on a few, first.

No. No one. No one at all.

Yeah…Kinda scary.

I'm hearting this, but I don't know if I'm interpreting it the way you meant it.

My wife's white and has brown nipples.

I <3 that bull.

Also an illusion? The security deposit you put down on that apartment once the manager sees that you painted Pac-Man all over it.