1. Gillian Cooke
This is the ass that put Women’s Bobsledding on the map. SHE HAS A FACE, TOO. She also used to be a fairly successful track star, before taking up gravity. So watch for this one.
2. Nicola Minichiello
Nicola is the other half of the infamous pants-splitting UK team. They also happen to be the reigning world champions.
3. Heather Moyse
Heather is probably the cutest Canadian in the Olympics, hands down. She is a “brakeman,” which you could probably make into something dirty if you wanted.
4. Bree Schaaf
Team USA! Bree used to do the skeleton (which is just racing a lunch tray down a chute, basically) but switched to bobsled in 2007. This is her first Olympics!
5. Helen Upperton
Helen is a Kuwaiti-born Canadian bobsledder, so there will almost certainly be an emotional montage about her at some point. She finished fourth at the Turin Olympics (with Heather Moyse).
6. Kallie Humphries
Kallie is the third member of the Canadian Bobsled Love Triangle—she also used to race with Heather Upperton, and she now races with Heather Moyles. She’s also married to another (male) Canadian bobsledder.