11 Delectable Meals That — Aww F**k It I'm Just Gonna Microwave Something In A Mug

I'm just really not in the mood to chop up a bunch of ingredients and get all precious with some BS I'm about to eat. It's just lunch. Warning: NSFW Language to follow.

1. Macaroni or whatever

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Yeah, fine. I'll just reheat some macaroni I made the other day. I'm not even that hungry anyway.

2. Some bullshit soup

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Can you microwave the soup when it's still in the can? Aww shit, just shut up and put it in the mug.

3. Shitty brownie

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Let's not get cute and pretend like I put some Betty Crocker mix in the mug and cooked it that way. I bought the brownie from Vons. Who gives a shit? It's in the mug now. You got what you wanted.

4. Eggs I guess

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Ah shit, all my plates are dirty. Whatever, just put it in a mug.

5. Chicken bolognese that my mom made the other day

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Oh, get off your goddamn high horse like you're better than me or something. You're the one looking at food in a mug, you tub of shit.

6. Uncooked rice

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Get off my goddamn back, I'll cook it later.

7. Fritos that I bought for some unknown reason even though I hate Fritos

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They're a bullshit chip.

8. Dry cereal

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Get off my back. My milk expired, OK? No, I'm not gonna microwave it. You stupid or something?

9. Unevenly microwaved cookie

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Yeah, fine, I tried to make one of those hoity-toity cookie-in-a-mug pieces of shit. You want to see it all nice and perfect or whatever? Go to Pinterest for that. I'm gonna eat this shit anyway.

10. A mug inside another mug

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Oh, it's not food you say? Wow, you must be a Rhodes Scholar or something. You know where I went to school? University of go to hell.

11. Macaroni again

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What do you want from me? There was still some left. I'm just gonna shit all this stuff out anyway.