1. There will be blue wigs aplenty.
2. Katy will act like a long-lost Disney princess.
3. She will be down to take selfies.
She took more than a few duckface photos and grabbed what look like a month's worth of fan mail (yes, people actually write PHYSICAL LETTERS sometimes.) Don't worry, nosebleed fans: Katy shouted up to the high seats too.
4. She will express her love for her fans all night long.
5. Everything. Will Be. A. Rainbow.
6. There will be a cat-themed fashion show to Madonna's "Vogue."
Purrrfect.
7. There will be jump-roping in the dark.
8. She might go a little Neil deGrasse Tyson on everyone.
9. There will be many outfit changes, from hot pink catsuits to butterfly-covered gowns.
10. You will go to Egypt.
11. She will ask if it's your first time.
This is how she reacted after asking people if they'd seen her before. Don't we all hide in the nearest cat tower when we're embarrassed? Katy, you're such a goof.
12. She will celebrate your birthday...
13. ...and there will be what feels like A GAZILLION balloons.
14. Above all: You WILL dance your ass off.
Even if you didn't go in intending to. BECAUSE THIS IS HOW WE DO.
A previous version of the article misspelled a nickname for Katy Perry fans. They are called Katy Cats, not Katy Kats.