The 32 Best Things About Being A Kid In The ’90s

Ah, memories. By the man behind @tweetsfrom97.

1. Video games provided an amazing education.

Thanks to Streets Of Rage you knew that if you smashed in enough phone boxes you’d eventually find a roast chicken.

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2. And the graphics were incredible.

When FIFA ‘98 came out it was almost impossible to distinguish the players on the screen from those in real life.

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3. The only thing you had to watch out for was your mate shoving you off the pool table cushion and into the pocket on Micro Machines.

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4. Thanks to the revolutionary Teletext you could now access cheat codes 24 hours a day!

As long as you were prepared to wait for the 24 pages to scroll through.

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5. At school all you needed was a wetsuit-material pencil case and everyone would be jealous.

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6. Slopping on discount wet-look gel was the way forward.

The more the cooler really. Though if you really wanted to make a statement, look no further than streaks.

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7. You’d be guaranteed a year’s supply of Lynx every Christmas.

But which do the girls prefer - Voodoo, Africa or Java?

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8. And if you found three crumpled David Battys at the bottom of your school-bag you could be guaranteed someone would swap them for an Eric Cantona shiny.

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9. At home your mum might come back with a Dorling Kindersley Guide To Inline Skating from the library.

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10. If not you could always browse the new Argos catalogue.

Especially exciting if there was a lady modelling non-slip shower mats in the bathroom section. Maybe rip it out and hide it under your bed?

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11. You’d hyperventilate after spending the afternoon blowing the dust out of your SNES cartridges.

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12. And if you were feeling fearless you could wind down by reading through a Goosebumps book.

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13. Until the day came when finally you graduated to Point Horror.

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14. Most of your friends had girlfriends that you wouldn’t know because they “met them on holiday and only saw them once a year”.

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15. But at least you could reply you had trials for Man Utd, Brazil and Italy. Remember that time you nutmegged Roberto Baggio?

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16. Playing around with your PC was the ultimate way to spend your evenings.

Why not make your mouse pointer into a space shuttle and put the trail on maximum?

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17. Or just close the curtains, kick back and watch the Windows 3D Pipes Screensaver for a while.

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18. An important rule was to peel off the parental advisory stickers on your Cypress Hill album in case your mum sees.

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19. But what’s so grown up about ‘weeds’ anyway?

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20. You didn’t have to worry about world events because when you got up early to watch the news on Ceefax you didn’t understand any of it anyway.

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21. And financial crises hardly mattered when you could rub The Queen’s Nose and get pretty much whatever you wanted.

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22. Though the ultimate goal was to have Bernard’s Watch. He never even used it properly anyway.

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23. Your biggest dream was that one day Boyzone might harmonise “Happy Birthday” down the phone to you on Live & Kicking.

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24. But you were happy enough to laugh along to Trevor and Simon.

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25. That alien playing marbles at the end of Men In Black messed with your head for days afterwards.

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26. DVDs were just coming out and boasted amazing features. Scene selection, interactive menus - you name it.

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27. And to make money all you had to do was set up a Tamagotchi babysitting club.

Atsushi Tsukada / AP
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28. If you were feeling bold you could venture onto disc two of your “Now That’s What I Call Music” CD and hear scary rock music by bands like Reef and Ocean Colour Scene.

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29. But mostly you enjoyed how the lyrical ingenuity of Phats was complemented by the subtle production skills of Smalls.

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30. Your ISS Pro team boasted amazing players like “Robbie Fooler”, “Steve McMananan”, and “Paul Gascone”.

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31. And Sunday evenings were spent listening to Dave Pearce’s Dance Anthems on your AM/FM clock radio.

Photograph: BBC
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32. And best of all, the one secret you kept to yourself was that floppy disc under your bed marked ‘System Files’ - who would guess it actually contained pictures of Melinda Messenger?

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Follow @tweetsfrom97 for more of this sort of thing.

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