1. The Personal Space Invader
“Oh… was your hand there? Sorry!” And then they do it again two seconds later.
2. The Beauty Queen
Whether behind the wheel or on a crowded train, no place is too shaky or crowded for the Beauty Queen to apply (and re-apply) her face.
3. The Oblivious Blabber
Ah, yes, so glad to hear that you’re totally not gonna call that guy back because he didn’t pay for dinner last night, and so are the other 50 commuters in this train car. SMH.
4. The Sleepy Seat Hoggers
They stayed out till last call last night and simply cannot live on the 9 a.m. express train. Hey, we’ve all been there.
5. The Human Boombox
“What? Is my music loud? Can you hear every single word?”
6. The New Couple
They just can’t get enough of each other, no matter how early it is. Get a room!
7. The Class Trip
What more could you need on your way to work but a few dozen kids yelling at each other over the noise of the train? Such delight.
8. The Uninvited Guest
Whether it’s a bicycle, an armoire, or a tiny horse, a huge object on the morning train is a criminal offense.
9. The Workaholic
You have three stops to go before the office, time to fire up the Excel sheet!
10. The Sneaky Reader
If you feel like someone is watching you, it’s because there’s someone reading your magazine and inching closer and closer to see the captions on the photos. Act calm, they’ll go away soon.
11. And last but not least: The Extreme Groomer
Times this is OK = never. Lord have mercy.