The Official Hipster Survival Guide To New York City

If you’re a Hipster currently living in NYC, this might save your life.

2. 1. Accept You’re a Hipster

It’s the first but maybe the hardest and most important thing to do. Once you accept the fact you’re a hipster, you’ll be able to deal with everything that comes along with it.

3. 2. Don’t F*ck with the Locals

We’ve been here long enough to know the deal, keep your silly business to yourself.

4. 3. Stay in Williamsburg

Williamsburg is Hipster central… try your best to stay there, you’ll be safe amongst your people.

5. 4.Travel in Groups for Safety

If you need to go outside of Williamsburg, try to travel in packs of 3 or more for your own safety.

6. 5. Stick to the L Train

It takes you from your safety zone of Williamsburg to the crazy world of Union Square 14th street, one of the few places you are safe to roam.

7. 6. Look Poor to Not Get Robbed

The last thing you want is to randomly end up in a scary neighborhood, so why press your luck? If you look poor nobody will try to rob you for your iPhone.

8. 7. Do Not Go to The Bronx

Do you really need to?

9. 8. Check In with Your Rich Dad

You need to keep that cash flowing while you work on your “art.”

10. 9. Keep Your Laces on Tight

If you ever run into a bad situation, you can always run away… keep your shoe laces on tight so you won’t trip up and fall.

11. 10. Shave. Yeah, You Too Ladies

Some guys can pull of a beard well, but please keep it groomed. Ladies, you can’t pull off a beard.

12. 11. Wear Bright Clothes at Night

Make yourself extra visible at night, the last thing you want is to get into an accident on your $500+ fixed gear bicycle.

13. 12. Do Not Wear your Girlfriends Pants

C’mon, are you serious?

14. 13. Do Not Talk About Your Blog

Blogs are like opinions, nobody cares about yours.

15. 14. You’re Not “From” Brooklyn

Just because you live or hang out there doesn’t mean you’re from there.

16. 15. Do Not Write Graffiti. Ever

Yeah, just don’t.

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