There's a 12 Mile Blob-Monster Eating Alaska

So there's a huge thing floating of the coast of Alaska and this is what their saying about it: "It's certainly biological." "It's definitely not an oil product of any kind. It has no characteristics of an oil, or a hazardous substance, for that matter." Also "someone turned in what was left of a dead goose -- just bones and feathers -- to the borough's wildlife department."