15 Ways To Spot A REAL New Yorker

The self-proclaimed "New Yorkers" who post NYC Buzzfeed lists are usually transplants from St. Louis who live in Hoboken. Here's how you can tell the folks who were actually born and bred in the 5 boroughs and surrounding areas...

1. We only insult people in foreign languages

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"Don't be such a malaka. Only a stunad like you would act like a maricon, you putz."

2. Dating NYC women = CIA interrogations

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"What do you do?" "What's your title?" "How much do you make?" "Is that net or gross?" "What are your 5 and 10 year plans?" "I expect a detailed medical history by COB today."

3. The words "John Starks" induce nausea, fever and chills

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2 for 18. Game 7. Years of therapy.

4. We have accents that don't make sense

This city is full of people who were born and raised in Queens, yet inexplicably sound like they just arrived from Uzbekistan 3 weeks ago.

5. We say things that horrify the PC crowd

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"You shoulda seen this retard who cut me off today."

6. We see this at Jets games and are unfazed

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Just another Sunday.

7. We're insane hypochondriacs

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Random pain in my elbow? Definitely bone cancer.

8. Our reaction to hipster fusion food

Keep that foie gras the hell away from my bagel.

9. Anyone wearing a Mets jersey.

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This is a curse you're born with.

10. We find nothing entertaining about "Jersey Shore"

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So the idiots we grew up with got a show. Stop the presses.

11. Our reaction to tourists taking selfies at Ground Zero

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You stay classy, hayseeds.

12. We talk about our high school the way you talk about college

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You also got into Harvard? Yawn.

13. We know better than to drive in the city

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Cabbies, pedestrians, horses, exploding manhole covers. Next.

14. We all have at least one relative like this

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Holidays are always a treat.

15. We have trust issues

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Particularly with people from Pumpkin Nuts, Wisconsin who lecture us on where to get the best slice of pizza in the city.