WHY LIFE ISN’T LIKE A MOVIE

Boy likes girl, girl likes boy, they both fall in love. Only if you’re Jane Eyre.

1. So you’ve been dreaming of true love’s kiss

2. Maybe something like this?

5. Heck, even an awkward dance would be something

6. But life isn’t like period dramas

Even Bridget can’t understand it

7. And so you decide that settling for Bridget Jones’s life is acceptable

She’s a modern woman who doesn’t expect men to dance or write poetry for her

8. That’s before you realise that Bridget gets the man too and isn’t a helpless singleton

9. So now you can’t relate to Bridget, but you can still follow her advice

10. It’s time to move on and watch more films in the hope that it will find you the perfect man

11. But in the end they either leave, die or live happily ever after

The latter one is preferable

12. But it will be alright because all you need to do is try to find one man who takes an interest

13. And one date leads to another

14. And finally you begin to feel as though your life could be a movie

15. But then something happens which means the relationship ends

16. And so you spend the rest of your days sleeping and drinking

17. Until you’re told to snap out of it and your reaction is…

18. But then real life gets in the way of mourning and you return to work with a hangover

19. You slowly move out of the dark abyss and return to watching the films which ruin your life

20. Just because your expectations will never ever slip

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