The Iowa Caucuses Drinking Game

If you plan on staying up late and watching coverage of the first-in-the-nation Republican caucus, you’re going to need this.

Image by Charles Dharapak / AP

1. If someone says “expectations” (“expectations game,” “beats expectations,” etc), 1 Drink

2. If someone says “ground game,” 1 Drink

3. If someone says “evangelical,” 1 Drink

4. If someone says “momentum,” 1 Drink

5. If someone says “Newt-mentum” or “Mo-Mitt-num,” Chug, Punch Your TV

Image by Samantha Sais / Reuters

6. If someone says “drop out” or “dropping out,” 1 Drink

7. If someone says “narrows the field” or “narrowing the field,” 1 Drink

8. If someone says “comeback kid,” 1 Drink

9. If someone says “abortion,” 1 Drink

10. If someone says “Santorum Salad,” Chug A Frothy Mixed Drink

Image by Jeff Haynes / Reuters

11. If someone says “Mormon” or “LDS,” 1 Drink

12. If someone says “Huckabee,” 1 Drink

13. If someone says “George W. Bush,” 1 Drink

14. If someone questions the relevance of the Iowa caucuses, 1 Drink

15. If someone is broadcasting from or being interviewed in a pizzeria or coffee shop, 2 Drinks

Image by Mark Wilson / Getty Images

16. If someone says “New Hampshire,” 1 Drink

17. Is someone says “South Carolina, 1 Drink

18. If someone says “racist newsletter,” 2 Drinks

19. If someone mentions the Duggar Family, 2 Drinks

20. If the Duggar Family is actually shown on TV, 19 Drinks

(Ed. Note: It is for some reason very difficult to find a photo of Ron Paul ingesting anything, let alone fluids.)

Image by /Brian Snyder / Reuters