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11 Reasons Gatsby Is More Like Alien From "Spring Breakers" Than Don Draper

Even though everyone has been comparing Gatsby to Draper, he has far more in common with Alien from Spring Breakers.

1. Gatsby Loves Showing Off His Fancy Shirts

Alien Loves Showing Off His Fancy Shirts

But Not Don!

Don is “too cool” to care about clothes.

2. Gatsby Deals The Drug Of His Day

Alien Deals The Drug Of His Day

But Not Don!

Don sells something far worse than drugs: consumerist lies

3. Gatsby Knows How To Party

Alien Knows How To Party

But Not Don!

Don doesn’t like parties. Not even on his birthday when Megan surprised him with a Zooby Zooby Zoo!

4. Gatsby’s Fake Name Is Based On His Real Name

Alien’s Fake Name Is Based On His Real Name

But Not Dick’s!

Dick Whitman stole the name of a person he “accidentally” killed. And that person’s name was Don Draper.

5. Gatsby Loves Listening To Organ And Piano Music

Alien PLAYS The PIANO!!!

Don HATES Music!

Remember how he acted like he was getting thrown into Dante’s Inferno because he had to go see the Rolling Stones!??

6. Gatsby Believes In True Love

Alien Believes In True Love

But Not Don!

Don Draper is only capable of loving one person: Don Draper.

7. Gatsby Has A Sweet Pool

Alien Has A Sweet Pool

But Not Don!

Don has to go to the gym to swim

8. Gatsby Has A Cool Convertible

Alien Has A Cool Convertible

Don Drives Convertibles Sometimes…But They’re Always Rentals

9. Gatsby Has A Great Smile, “A Smile That Understands You As Far As You Want To Be Understood”

Alien Has A Great Smile, A Smile That “Shines Bright Like A Diamond”

Don Rarely Smiles

Not even in Hawaii!!!

10. Gatsby Stands For Equality, Proudly Wears Pink, And Hates Daisy’s Racist Husband Tom

Alien Believes In Equal Opportunity And Gives The Girls Important Jobs

Don Is A Sexist. He’ll Always Treat Peggy Like A Glorified Secretary

And He Basically Fired Sal Because Sal Wouldn’t “Satisfy” Lucky Strike

11. Gatsby Takes A Bullet For Love

Alien Takes A Barrage Of Bullets For Love

We All Know That Don Is Going To Take The Easy Way Out (Of A Window)

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