The Charlie Sheen one sums it up perfectly.
The Charlie Sheen one sums it up perfectly.
They could have picked a better title for their sitcom, though. Anything that ends in “-ish” just sounds gimmicky and lame.
Taylor ain’t too swift, but I hear she’s FAST.
Pretty sure Miley’s discography is banned as a torture device under the Geneva Convention.
Billy Joel left his first wife for Christie Brinkley. Bono flies in a private helicopter to impoverished African countries that don’t have food or indoor plumbing. John Mayer is a drunk racist (remember the comments about “my white dick” and Rihanna) who thinks he’s god’s gift to blues music (he’s got as much Mississippi soul in him as Dan Aykroyd). Everyone else I had either never heard of or voted them down because not only does their sorry excuse for “music” suck but so do they. The others can be kind of douchey IRL but at least have the redeeming quality of their music is good. I voted that all the rappers suck because rap sucks. Pretty sure I voted down all the females because they’re nothing but disease-ridden stripper hos. No talent whatsoever.
Oh, and how could I forget. Bad Company: rules “…till the day I die!”
Here ya go. Bruce Springsteen: rules
Peter Gabriel: rules
Duran Duran: rules
Elvis Presley: rules
The Beatles: rule
The Beach Boys: rule
Johnny Cash: rules
Willie Nelson: rules
The Bee Gees: rule
Cyndi Lauper: rules
The Pretenders: rule
Fleetwood Mac: rules
Van Halen: rules (No Roth v. Hagar flame wars, please)
The Clash: rules
Frankie Valli & Four Seasons: rule
Eurythmics/Annie Lennox: rules
Melissa Etheridge: rules
Sheryl Crow: rules
Sarah McLachlan: rules
Amanda Fucking Palmer!!!: rules
Aretha Franklin: rules
Marvin Gaye: rules
Stevie Wonder: rules
Ray Charles: rules
Diana Ross/Supremes: rules
Rolling Stones: rule
David Bowie: rules
Elton John: rules
Roy Orbison: rules
Nat “King” Cole: rules
Frank Sinatra: rules
Barry White: rules
Bob Dylan: rules
Jefferson Airplane (etc.): rules
Green Day: rules
Blink 182: rules
Metallica: rules (Leave Lars’ anti-Napster politics out of this)
The Eagles: rule (…and let’s leave Don Henley’s similar stance out of this too)
Beastie Boys: rule EVERYONE ON THIS LIST WHO ISN’T PHIL COLLINS, DMB, BILLY JOEL, U2, RADIOHEAD OR COLDPLAY: SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS!
Question should have asked if Taylor Swift sucked John Mayer.
Honestly, I put rules because I thought they wrote Bon Jovi. I don’t know who Bon Ives is.
The fuck is an “Aryan Grande?” A german font?
Who have probably sucked every other musician on this list at least once. Including Steve Perry and Tyler Perry, who are not in this article. Pretty much any female artist on this list is a no-talent whore.
1D is actually 8==D !
Like the ones who wanted to suck Lady Gaga and voted she “rules.” Rules what, a Vegas brothel where she works as the madam?
Probably the most entertainment anyone’s had at Wrigley Field since the Teddy Roosevelt administration.
Break out the Kleenex. I voted he sucks. Bonus suck points for being “BFFs” with Jimmy Failon.
I never even heard of him. I just skipped the ones I didn’t know.
The question wasn’t complete. Should have read Miley sucks HER DADDY.
Chad is a douchey Canuck who looks like Nic Cage’s redneck character in Con Air. He is married to Avril Latrine, who also sucks.
Why wasn’t Kurt Angle on this list? :)
Whoever said Phil Collins sucks deserves a knock on the door from Bashar Assad.
I skipped them because I didn’t know who they were.
Me too. But apparently it’s now against the law to say that because it’s considered “slut shaming.” Since when did this site get invaded by the VD girls at Jizzabel.
Sorry, fantards. Taylor Not-so-Swift sucks every other musician on this list, and Queen Bey-atch in-da-Crotch SUCKS THE PRESIDENT. Her crack-dealing no-talent husband sucks rocks too. Pretty much anything released after Cobain died sucks epic donkey balls.
How could they leave out that Robert Patrick was also in the Terminator series. He plays T-1000, the “bad” robot sent back in time to 1995 to kill John Connor. Enter Arnie, who is also sent back to rescue him.
I know, how about mentioning that Gillian Anderson is now a published sci-fi author in her own right?
Buzzfeed should do sliders on the cast of “Sliders.” So meta.
She might have had some kind of surgery to remove a vocal polyp or something. Or she was born without strong enough pipes to actually scream.
#2 Kirsten looks like she’s been cryogenically preserved. By the way, whatever happened to Toby McGuire?
That’s OK… he still got to play the badass chicken-suit guy in Say Anything. The guy at the grad party who bums a drag off Lloyd and spots him a beer.
Which was John Hughes’ answer to the studios’ bossing him around over Pretty in Pink. The original ending had Molly Ringwald ending up with Ducky and being true to her roots. This being the materialistic eighties, test audiences were pissed (and so was Molly, who, being the typecast “princess” of the era had wanted a more traditional Cinderella ending as well), so the studio forced a rewrite, effectively cutting John out of the equation. John then rewrote the whole story with the ending that he wanted, in this case the poor kid (Eric Stoltz) deciding that he and Amanda (Lea Thompson) aren’t a good fit and that he really loves Watts (Mary Stuart Masterson). Not surprisingly, the latter film was not as commercially successful as the former. Pretty sure Say Anything (not Hughes but Cameron Crowe), while it had only modest returns at the box office initially (despite being a beloved favorite later on), would have bombed entirely and maybe even ended John Cusack’s career if Lloyd had ended up sticking around Seattle and hooking up with Corey, instead of tagging along to England with Diane. Someone else would have come along with a “better” script, and had Rob Lowe end up with Princess Diana or something.
Crispin Glover played the luggage guy with the amputated arm in Hot Tub Time Machine. Which is basically a raunchy, frat-boy rip off of Back to the Future. I love John Cusack but this movie was such a fail, and nobody wants to see a 45-year-old “Marty McFly” wannabe relive the good old days. No surprise he backed out of the sequel. He must have done this one as a favor or maybe lost a bet.
Or the guy that played Marvin Berry. Or Huey Lewis, for that matter.
This was Reagan’s favorite movie for two reasons. One is because his name is mentioned in a famous dialogue scene. Marty has already gone back in time; Doc Brown asks him who’s president in 1985, and he of course says “Ronald Reagan.” Doc starts laughing hysterically (Reagan was still a B-movie actor in 1955) and asks Marty jokingly, “Well then, who’s the first lady? Jane Wyman?” (Reagan’s first wife — Nancy got a real kick out of that line too.) He had arranged for a private screening of the film at the White House and kept asking the Secret Service agent to replay the same scene on the tape over and over again, cracking up just like Doc every time he saw the scene. (At this point he probably thought he was seeing it for the first time again anyway.) Back to the Future became part of the official White House video library, even though eventually the Secret Service had to get a new tape for the president because repeated viewings had ruined the first copy. The second, and more troubling reason, is because it epitomized Reagan’s vision of what his administration would do for (or to) America: Bringing it into the future by bringing it back to the past. But by fast-forwarding past the ’60s and ’70s, the time loop basically ensured that the civil rights, gay rights, and women’s rights movements basically never happened. We don’t literally stay stuck in the ’50s, but the idea is that the ’80s (and, presumably, the ’90s and the 21st century) get “cleaned up” because we learned lessons from the ’50s about bringing back “the good old days.” I heard this on the NatGeo 1980s retrospective and found it very disconcerting.
Fuck you, Larry IS king. He’s still better than anything Crap News Network farts out today. I’d rather watch Ted Turner pick his nose and flick the boogers off his mustache than subject my eyes to what his once groundbreaking TV channel has become. Anderson Cooper is really starting to grate on me and don’t even get me started on Piers Moron. CNN sucks (but at least it’ll never be as bad as Fox Noise). Bring Larry back and just give the whole channel over to him.
Larry is king.
Anyone remember the SNL sketch about the Leno-Conan debacle where Larry King’s Twitter was “CaptainSuspenders1904”?
He’ll be 81 on November 19. I think he’s entitled to a little bit of senile craziness at this point.