The 19 Most Annoying Things About Being Vegan
Trust me, I am one. Sometimes it’s just as tiresome for us as it is for everyone else.
1. People who pronounce it “vaygun.”
Vaygun sounds like we came to Earth from the planet Vega. Which…actually, now that sounds kind of cool. Keep on saying that, grandmas who say “vaygun.” We can’t stay mad at you.
2. Everyone you know is suddenly a nutrition expert.
Seriously with this protein thing.
3. Suboptimal fake meats
Let’s be honest — there are some truly fantastic vegan alternatives out there…but we’re not 100% there yet.
4. The vegan option at a restaurant is ALWAYS a wrap.
Ah, wraps. I dimly remember — roughly 10,000 wraps ago — when I used to not HATE EVERYTHING YOU STAND FOR.
5. The vegan option at a wedding is ALWAYS grilled vegetables.
I don’t want to seem ungrateful, and I’m certainly not going to complain, but that looks like A LOT of zucchini. Is all. Whatever, forget it. Thank you for inviting me to your wedding and for providing a vegan option when you didn’t have to. I am a terrible person. I take this one back.
6. And let’s not even talk about continental breakfast at a hotel…
Free breakfast sounds sooooo good until you realize that literally the only thing you can eat is hash browns with a side of hash browns, with a black coffee. Yes, fine – also a fruit cup. But, like, this is a secret and don’t tell anyone, but vegans feel pretty much the same way about fruit cups as everyone else does.
7. Getting constantly trapped under the weight of your own logic…
…and having to be like, “Yes, true. OK, that is a great point, but also…remember how this all began with me just politely turning down the cheese dip? YOU STARTED THIS NIGHTMARE CONVERSATION. You just forgot that you did.” GODDAMN IT, CHELSEA.
8. Secretly finding this funny.
Sometimes a good burn is just a good burn.
10. Getting lumped in with the gluten-free people.
For Christ’s sake, it’s already hard enough!!!
12. No, seriously. The “vegan at a dinner party” joke.
THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS, VEGANS.
13. People saying stuff like this and thinking they’ve vanquished you with their genius.
“Oh no, I have been defeaaaaated. I would like to formally apologize for initiating this discussion by asking the waiter to hold the cheese on my veggie burger. Please immediately begin force-feeding me hard-boiled eggs until I explode under the weight of my own contradictions. It’s all I deserve.”
16. People who don’t know peanut butter doesn’t have butter and coconut milk doesn’t have milk.
17. Being called a hypocrite if you feed your pet meat, and crazy if you don’t.
18. Other Vegans
Ugh — other vegans are THE WORST. Who talks like this???
19. And, finally…the comment section for every article ever written about veganism.
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billybadass 4 months agoHOLY CRAP THERE ARE FOUR PAGES OF COMMENTS. THAT’S GOT TO BE SOME KIND OF RECORD.
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MissKatAttackMock 4 months agoPKU, people who have to be vegan so they don’t die. Look it up
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jessicalynnt 4 months agoI agree with you, and I’m not Vegan. Most of the Vegans I’ve met have been terrible people though, to be honest.
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isabliss 4 months agoThese comments are the worst….especially Marrianne Bessey and Monique Dee(above) responding to Taylor Murphy for basically saying that people should choose the diet that they want. I’ve never witnessed such aggressive reactions to such a neutral statement. Chill the fuck out everybody. Jesus.
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fashionfan 4 months ago
All true…but still so totally worth it to not hurt animals, be healthier, and reduce my carbon footprint.
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ImALoserBaby 4 months agoi dont really care if people are vegan or not, but i do kinda have to agree (to be fair my opinion is based off anecdotal experiences), but probably all the vegans i have met are a tad bit pretentious, i also feel like the ones i’ve met have some self-entitlement issues.
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macness 4 months ago
I try and fight every single day to stop that stereotype. But a short, recent anecdote: I have been working for my company for 3 months. I bring in lunch and snacks and politely decline when people offer me a cookie [butter] or other goodies they have brought. I thank them and get on with my work day. Fast forward to the company christmas party where we were going to have a room at a restaurant. I discretely called ahead and discussed with the manager that I could not eat what was on our fixed menu and they assured me they would accommodate me. My food comes up and it’s different than everyone else’s so people at my table started asking me questions about why I was having something different. I told them that I was a vegan and the menu didn’t cater to that lifestyle so the kitchen was gracious enough to accommodate me. Cue the open can of worms…. I was at that point no longer enjoying a meal with my colleagues, who up to this point didn’t know I was vegan, but now participating in an interrogation. I was able to get through lunch fielding question after question, at times deflecting rude comments. All because I ordered different food. In addition to that, after that event, every time I start chit chat with a colleague on something COMPLETELY unrelated, my cube mate will throw in “Did you know he’s a vegan?” Which honestly, is annoying. It may as well be said like “Did you know he has gonorrhea?” It’s my damn lifestyle. Let me live it in peace. (Not to you ImALoserBaby) If you’re curious and have an open mind, I’d be glad to talk about it. Start treating me like a leper and you show me what kind a person you are. Every time someone makes a comment similar to yours about self-entitlement or pretentious, all I can think of is “I just wanted to eat my fucking food. You’re the one waving bacon in my face.” Anyway, I hope you get to meet some unpretentious vegans. I know a lot of them. You probably don’t know them because they aren’t waving their lifestyle all up in your face.
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A.Leigh 4 months ago
That sucks. I’ve never met any non-obnoxious vegans, but there aren’t really a whole lot of vegans where I’m from anyway. But I have met plenty of obnoxious anti-vegetarians as well. A friend of a friend is a vegetarian, and she went out to eat with a group once and ordered normal, vegetarian food (soup?) and went to the restroom, and while she was gone, the other people put meat (other soup?) in her food, and then waited until she was done eating to tell her. That’s just mean. And even people who wouldn’t go that far seem to love the idea of convincing vegetarians to eat meat. If people can more or less keep it to themselves—and I have no problem with vegetarians/vegans trying to persuade people that eating meat is unethical (if you really believe that, I’d expect nothing less), so long as they keep it to a minimum and back off when the person makes it clear they’re not interested—then I don’t care what they eat. I would hope anyone eating a vegan diet knows enough about the realities of the nutrition behind it, because it’s pretty much impossible to get all the nutrients you need without supplements, but most people don’t eat very good diets to begin with anyway. Unless you’re my kid, my spouse, or maybe my parent or best friend, your diet isn’t really any of my concern.
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Shannen Maas 3 months ago
Daiya makes cheese wedges that are a little like brie, give them a try. I like the jalapeno havarti kind!
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Shannen Maas 3 months ago
I think that’s a pretty bold statement. I have shoes that look like they’re made of leather but they are all synthetic and even say “suitable for vegetarians on the bottoms”. If I had a dime for every time some smug omnivore tried to call me out for my shoes or my belt or my sweater or anything else I eat or wear for that matter, I could retire early. The same is true for all other vegans I know.
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porcuse 4 months ago
please, vegans/vegetarians, stop saying you miss this or that or “cant eat it”. yes, you can eat it, PeTA is not goi.g to track you down and shoot you if you ‘break’ and eat something with dairy or meat in it. nobody will. you are choosing not to. someone who is allergic cant eat something bc they might get really sick or die. you wont (generally) on principle. and you’re right, author/op etc, vegetarian substitutes generally suck nards, vegan bacon is an abomination. but morningstar stuff can.be good, their chikn nuggets are better than the real thing usually
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zacharyk2 4 months agoWhat cracks me up is how people say “I can’t eat that” when in reality they just choose not to. If you want to eat cheese, eat that shit. If you don’t, then don’t. I don’t care what anyone chooses/chooses not to eat, I just laugh at people that make it sound like some otherworldly force compels them to be the way they are.
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Klo732 4 months agoI refer to myself as a vegetarian. But what it comes down to is my own personal lifestyle choices. And I choose my diet just as people who eat meat choose theirs (though I know some people have health issues that don’t make it a choice, overall that’s not the case) so I don’t like to hear people say vegans choose to be vegans because well meat eaters choose to be meat eaters. I care very much for animal rights and welfare. It is very easy for me not to eat meat. But I don’t find it easy to do all things vegan. If someone else does than I am very grateful for how they are able to help the cause. But I’m also grateful for a person who eats chicken but no other meat. Which does bring me to a question. How come people don’t question or bother people who don’t eat pork for religious beliefs? Why is it ok for them to make that choice but vegetarians and vegans get a hard time for it?
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